you should see me the way I see you

5

Outfit that Isaac wares at the top

May 26. 2021

Today I have decided to wear what I got yesterday. well, I was getting ready I was listening to a band that Hope said was good, it's called Lovejoy. so I wore a floral pattern skirt, a beige oversized shirt with flowers in the middle that I tied in the front to make it look cropped, pride shoes, Pride socks, a denim bucket hat with daisy print, and girl underwear because it's what I wanna wear. I have always wanted to try feminine clothing, it just feels nice and right.

After getting dressed I grabbed my new makeup bag and went into my bathroom. The first thing I did was brush my teeth. After that, I decided to take out my eyeliner, eyeshadow, mascara, and my lipgloss. The makeup pulled everything together. I had on a slightly darker shade of eyeshadow than my pale skin. I looked really good. I hope Levi thinks so too.

When I got to school I saw my old friends, I tried to avoid them. It wasn't a success.

"Hey, why the fuck did you hit on Jaxson yesterday" What the fuck is Lincoln talking about?

"yeah, you little hoer" Is Andrew stupid I haven't slept with a guy... yet.

"I-I didn't" Okay, yeah I was nervous.

"don't pull that shit, Peters," Jack started to form a circle around me with the rest of Jaxson's friends.

"bu-but I'm telling the truth" Why won't they believe me?

"Why would we believe you?" Did I say that out loud "for years you have probably just watched all of us change in the locker room"

FUCK

***

I was keeping my head down. I just found Hope and her brothers.

"hi," I say bluntly.

"Hey, what's wrong," The twins said at the same time.

"Noth-" I was interrupted.

"hay babe" I look up. "who did this"

"no one, I just fell" I do not want Hope to know.

"You fell and gave yourself a black eye, a bruised lip, and a bloody nose? Yeah, no I don't believe you" Of course he doesn't.

"I don't wanna talk about it in front of H. Hope can you please leave, I wanna be alone with Levi"

"Oh yeah of course we can leave" they left.

"Who did this to you, babe," Levi asked even more worried than before. That is when I let the first tear fall.

" I-It was... it was Jack, Lincoln, Julian, Eli, and Andrew" I was full-on sobbing now. Levi pulled me into a tight embrace

"Hay, hay it's okay, I'm here now. It's okay." He was so genteel. When I stopped crying, Levi still held me, but not as tight. That is when Jaxson was approaching. Levi noticed him and turned to face me. He leaned closer, and closer until I felt his lips on mine. His soft lips connected to mine. It felt so right but so wrong. One day I will move on from Jaxson, I just know I will.

"Hey Isaac, I came over to apol- oh I'll just leave" Jaxson was going to apologize? Whatever, last time he did he lied. Now I have Levi. I do not want to love him anymore; all he did was heart me. Levi loves me, he won't hurt me, he bout the clothes I have always wanted. And he makes me blush, a lot. He loves me. Unlike Jaxson. I'm so sorry Jaxson, but I hate you. All he does is heart others and just does not care for anyone, anyone but himself. I do not want to love Jaxson, I have Levi, someone who cares for me, and everyone else. I don't have to be scared that I will be hit with Levi, but with Jaxson, that is all that he does to others, so why wouldn't he do it to me.

"Levi" he hummed in response "I love you" I was worried it was too soon, but I had to tell him.

"I love you too, Isaac" I was amazed, he loves me.

"you promise?"

"I promise" I was amazed, he loves me. "do you wanna, maybe, umm, come over after school."

"id love to"

***

Class. The second class of the day. It was language arts. I have this class with Hope. She is a straight A+ student in this class. Or what I live EU. She does my homework in this class. Hay, it's not mean, she loves reading and writing. I cannot wait to see Levi after school. I wonder what we will do. Wait a minute. What if we- uh never mind.

"Okay class, today we are doing a project. It will be an essay about your time at home for the next week. So, you can not get Hope to do your project this time" Mrs. Johnson said.

Most of the others groaned. I didn't until I saw a smirk on Levi's face. Well fuck. Or should I say, I am going to get fucked this week. Well, my teacher is going to love reading my and Levi's essays.

"Hey Isaac, we are going to have fun this week" I blushed a deep red.

***

Hope. She looks...sad? She hasn't looked like that in years.

"Isaac, can you walk me home. Please." It was less of a question and more of a statement.

"yeah, okay. I'll go tell the office that I'm going home for lunch."

"Okay."

To say I regret that day would be an understatement. I didn't know then what was going to happen. If I knew, I would have never let her leave.

***

"hay, I'm going back to school. See you tomorrow."

"Yeah, maybe."

I wish I never left.

***

"hay babe, you ready to go?" Levi request.

"yep" I announced popping the P.

"good." He smirked.

We were going to his car. I got a bad feeling by the time we were in his house. It's fine though. I don't think much of it and just keep going on with the day. I wasn't wanting to think about anything except Levi. I regret that day