Forever Red - an Anne and Gilbert Story

18. Breakaway

Chapter song: Rebel heart by First Aid Kit 

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The reality was that it didn't blow over. 

The first day back at school Ruby ignored her completely, which then caused all the girls to pester what had happened, and by the end of the week the whole school was in a tizz over Anne and Ruby's spat and what could have possibly caused it. Ruby didn't say a word over what had happened, but as the week wore on she seemed even more determined to continue with the cold silence aimed at Anne. 

Josie Pye was in seventh heaven! 

"Well Ruby, don't you mind that poor little orphan girl, I always said she was trouble" she announced, linking Ruby's arm and flouncing out of class with her, making sure she whispered loudly enough for Anne to hear. 

Anne sighed and collected her things, turning suddenly as she heard a sharp crack behind her.  Gilbert stood glaring at the door, his slate snapped in half in his hand where he'd gripped it too tight in anger. His face was stony and pinched, and he seemed to be holding himself very very still. She almost walked towards him to tell him not to mind it, but instead shook her head and simply headed out of the door herself. 

She needed to think, and she couldn't do that easily with Gilbert standing there waiting to either jump to her rescue before she had time to breathe, or explode. Infact, she'd pointedly tried to keep her distance from him as much as possible that week. She didn't know what to think, or do anymore, all she knew is she needed to be alone for a while. 

By Sunday Gilbert had obviously reached the end of his tether. After church he headed for Green Gables rather than home to talk about the situation. 

"Anne, I know Ruby is your friend but this is ridiculous! Are you really going to let her stand in the way of this, of us?" he reached for her hand but she pulled away.

"Gilbert, it's not just that is it?"

"What do you mean?" his forehead furrowed suddenly.

"Well we're both so young, and maybe this is what you think you want, but when you head off to college you'll change your mind, and this isn't something forever is it, so why cause such upset to everyone else for nothing?" she could feel each word as it ripped out of her throat reluctantly, but she held steady as she said them anyhow.

"Nothing?" Gilbert whispered, "Is that really what you think this is Anne?" he looked at her hard now, hazel eyes wide and imploring, searching for the truth in her face.

She looked back, making herself hold his gaze, unflinching, and tried to convince herself it was for the best.

"You know I'm right Gil" she said softly, "but we'll always be friends now."

"Friends?" he laughed, a hollow sound with no humour or mirth, "I don't need more friends Anne, I need you to be honest with me- and with yourself."  He took a slow deep breath "but, if you want to throw away your happiness then so be it, god knows I can't stop you" he finished with a voice Anne had never heard before.

He turned suddenly from her, and sped out of the yard and towards the meadow before she had time to register his response properly. 

She felt his leaving like the sun leaving the sky in summer; bereft of warmth and light, but she knew it was the right thing to do. 

This business with Ruby made her realise she was living a fairytale not reality, sneaking around pretending, playing at grown ups.  The truth was that Gilbert would soon find a more suitable beau, especially once he was at college, and all she would be then is even more heartbroken. Better to stop things now before they took the fantasy too far and hurts were permanent. Although, as Anne headed back to the house the ache in heart felt as if it was going to be there an eternity as it was.