airports ;; kim taehyung

ix. the monologue

soo-ah

20 years... i've been alive. all i was ever taught was how to be a proper woman, proper manners, how a "lady" should behave.

- flashback to when soo-ah was 4 years old -

"mummy mummy, i wanna buy the shorts!!! i don't wanna wear a skirt!!!!!" young soo-ah yelled in store, throwing a tantrum with her face puffed up and tears threatening to fall down her face.

"aaahhh, of course soo-ah, we'll buy what you're most comfortable in, let's go, i've bought the shorts you wanted," soo-ah's mother coaxed, hoping to stop soo-ah from crying.

upon arriving back home, young soo-ah skipped inside the house with her new shorts, excited to finally buy something of her choice, she though throwing a tantrum did indeed work. 

soo-ah's mother followed soo-ah into her room, locking the door behind her. she ripped soo-ah's dear shorts out of her hand, only to start yelling,

"JANG SOO-AH! WHAT WAS THAT AT THE STORE? EHHH?!" a red mark was left on soo-ah's face as her mother continued, "is that how a proper lady shall behave?!! wearing those hideously boyish SHORTS?! you are the daughter of the JANG family!!! had anyone there recognised us, the family would've been tarnished all because little soo-ah wanted to wear shorts," mocking soo-ah, her mother didn't stop. slap after slap, her mother continued despite the pain in soo-ah's eyes, teardrops gracing her cheeks. 

once her mother left, soo-ah put her shorts in her wardrobe, never wearing them at home, outside, anywhere. the incident was never even spoken of in the household. but from that day on, soo-ah never once questioned her parents, every time she thought she'd done something wrong, all she thought was "is this how a proper lady behaves?" trying to save the family name, ruined young soo-ah as well. 

current day soo-ah

never once did i question my parents, never once did i question their ways, had they been wrong? were all of their teachings wrong? was it wrong i never wore shorts as a child? was it wrong i never participated in sports? was it wrong i have not spoken in contractions since i was a child? is taehyung correct, i've really attached my self-worth to him haven't i? all i thought of in the past month was, where did my perfect life go, i've been the perfect lady all my life.

third person

soo-ah was soon realising the wrong in her ways, the wrong in her parent's ways, how their's and her thinking was deeply flawed. 

text message

to: leah, y/n

hi ! i want to apologise for before and would like to go shopping if you'd join me? : s

l : of course ! it's always a shock to learn your friend likes your ex-fiancée.

y : i'm sorry about that jangsoo-ya, shopping trip it is!

l : yes yes yes!! let's go shop!!!

ahhh, i'm so happy you agreed 11am tomorrow! : s