Wildest Dreams

n i ne

I was already pass the front lawn, shivering in my jacket and blowing hot air into my hands, when Glen emerged from the house after he told Nancy to lock the door behind us.

"Maple, hold up!"

I didn't stop so he jogged until he was walking beside me. He messed up his hair first before jabbing his hands into his jeans.

"You still like to run away," he remarked.

"You still like poking into other people's business," I talked back.

"I told you before—I don't get it why you have to leave and be away. When I confront you or even ask you how you're doing, you run away from me every single time. It's a miracle I talked to you into this at school."

I picked up my pace but Glen seemed to follow with ease.

"You're doing it again and it's tiring."

I stopped and whipped around to snap at him, seriously snap at him without the regret.

"You're gonna talk about your problems about me while you walk me home — is that really your plan, Glen?!" I fumed. All of controlled anger and friendliness I'd chosen to show earlier had been washed away by intense frustration and uproar. "Do you really think you're the only one with problems? You think I don't feel an inch guilt and regret and loneliness? I caused all of these... these... UGH!"

"Maple, calm down," Glen gently approached. His hand touched my arm, making me shudder and recoil away.

"Glen, I feel nothing but those three ever since I walked out the door, ever since I left," I continued with a lower tone. I breathed in as I fumbled with the seams of my gloves, which calmed me a bit more. 

"I am sorry, I am very sorry. I don't need you to forgive me, I just want you to know that."

I stepped back and stuffed my hands into the pockets of my jacket. My eyes were fixed down to our feet. I stayed in front of him and didn't run away like I used to.

"Can I hug you?" He asked, which caught me off guard. Still, I replied with a shy nod.

He pulled me in and wrapped his arms around me, embracing me in complete warmth of reconciliation and peace. His hand grazed over my head, his cheek pressing as well.

I gave in and rested my head on his chest.

He grew a lot taller than me. Back when I first met him, we were in the same height. But for one thing, he still smelled the same and it brought a lot of sense of familiarity.

"I forgive you," he whispered. His other hand brushed the strands of my hair. "I didn't mean to make you mad too. I guess the pent up feelings just got the best of me."

"You and me both," I remarked.

"Also, I may not understand what made you go away, but I understand most of the time that you had to deal with it on your own."

He paused and I pulled away from the hug, settling back to my comfortable personal space.

Glen tilted his face to see my downcasted face. "But you have us now again. You can talk to us anytime, at least in my part I'd always welcome you."

"Thank you." I flashed a small smile.

Glen grinned, standing back up straight in his feet. "Friends?"

"Friends, although I'm still a bit annoyed," I answered. "Just walk me home, will ya?"

Glen nodded. We turned back to the pavement ahead. The sound of my feet dragging along the concrete path filled the silence for a while. I could see in the corner of my eye that Glen was glancing at me sometimes. I kept looking down.

"I'm happy you guys are still strong together," I blurted. "I always knew Rod and Tina were going to end up together. You and Nancy seem pretty cool as a couple too."

Glen paused at his tracks, which made me look up to him. "You think Nancy and I are together?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Everyone in school does. Why?"

Glen laughed and resumed walking by my side.

"We aren't together. We were, but not anymore," he said.

"But I heard you even got detention for PDA." I furrowed my eyebrows.

He bared his teeth, as if remembering a bad memory. "That was embarrassing, but our relationship only lasted five months between 10th and 11th grade."

"Oh." I had a feeling I didn't need to know anything else more than that, but Glen continued on.

"It just didn't work. Even Tina and Rod could see it and they fight more than any other relationship I've seen."

I nodded again, while Glen...

"I guess it was mutual in some way, but not really, you know—"

"Serious?"

"Deep."

"Oh."

We both let out a sigh at the same time and we looked at each other. There was a shared genuine smile for a brief moment. The smile might have two different meanings, who knows. Nevertheless, it was good to smile again.

"How about you? Anyone th—"

"No," I immediately cut. With a sigh, I continued. "Well you know, the usual guys and gals but I've got a busy life so I didn't really entertain that idea."

"Yeah, you study a lot, I see."

"It's good—"

Distraction? I only keep my nose in books because I wanted to think of something else, instead of the constant haywires of thoughts that haunt me when I'm alone and vulnerable.

"It's good habit," I ended.

We crossed the road and reached the front of my house. It was probably past midnight by this time, a bit chilly and the moon was hiding in thick clouds. Only the light from the walkway and porch illuminated our surroundings.

"How do you plan on getting in?" Glen asked me.

"The same way I got out. I'll see you at school, Glen." I made a bee line towards the door.

"Yeah, you too Maple." He flashed a smile before he returned back to the direction we came from. When he was out of sight, I entered the darkly lit house.

Maybe it was because I finally spoke to them, even let some pent up feelings be free to throw the burden off my shoulders, or maybe because they've always been my safe space, but I didn't have a nightmare that night.