2022 WATTYS SHORTLISTED || After being forced into a marriage by her devoutly religious parents, Aspen's husband is diagnosed with a life-limiting illness, and she must find her purpose as well as fight feelings for her husband's nurse. || Aspen Wat...
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T W O M O N T H S L A T E R - A U G U S T 2 0 1 9
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I watch Summer as she grabs her laptop from the coffee table. Her bump has become more obvious now she's nearly seven months pregnant.
Something about her demeanour today is off, though. Usually, she's bouncing around, laughing, floating like she hasn't got a care in the world. Even with Joel gone, somehow the pregnancy has picked her up and made her happier despite our shared loss.
I can see a small hint of a smile on her now as she brings the laptop over, but I know something's wrong. She's hiding something, and if Joel's lies taught me anything, it's that lies will always get found out.
I know it's not as bad as Joel's lies, but she's hiding something.
"Summer, are you okay?" I ask.
"I know they say it's cliché and stereotypical, but I really love pink for a girl. I'm thinking of painting like a letter s on the wall – if that's okay – for Sienna as well," she enthuses, ignoring my question. "Now that they've said it's a girl more than once, I actually believe it."
"You can paint on the walls, that's fine," I say with a laugh and stare at the pink pram she's looking at getting. "I just... it's not an exact science, so don't buy everything pink and then be disappointed if the baby comes out as a boy!"
She chuckles. "You're right... I'm just... I'm so excited in case she really is a girl. Sienna Jolene Watkins."
I stop short for two reasons. Jolene? Watkins?
I suppose Watkins is inevitable really. It's Joel's last name, it's Joel's baby. But something about it feels a little... invasive. But then I'm engaged to Nick, where I'm assuming I'll choose to change my last name, so I'll no longer be a Watkins. Gabriel could choose to change his name to Watkins if ever wants to after he turns eighteen.
Something about it just feels strange. Maybe because Joel is dead, and I separate the two things in my life now.
As for Jolene... I burst out laughing.
"You're laughing at Jolene, right? I wanted to put Joel in there, but she's a girl, it might sound weird."
"Weirder than Jolene? Will she start belting out Dolly Parton before she can speak?" I snort and we both laugh.
"All right, maybe not Jolene. Maybe Jo? I like Joelle too. I don't know, I'll work it out," she says. "So, how're things with your dad going? Did he leave her?"
I notice the sudden shift in not talking about all things pregnancy. I wonder if she's starting to panic now, she's getting bigger and closer to it being real. Is she mourning? I don't know, but I don't want to broach the subject in case it hurts her too much.
