In My Dreams

Chapter Seven

Picking at the corner of the envelope, ripping away just enough to force my finger in to tear through the rest, I feel a sharp slash to my finger. Paper cut.
My heart is hitting my chest hard and my hands are shaking violently, pulling out the piece of paper inside and losing hold of it as it slips out my hand and drops to the kitchen floor. My heart continues to thud through my chest reaching down for the letter.
At first, I never noticed it but as I lowered my head towards the floor, I stagger back at the sight of red liquid on the floor.
"What is all of this?" I shriek. "Is that blood?"
Blood slides down my arm and soaking through my clothes as more blood gushes out from my finger. Looking behind me, there's even more blood over the floor, over the kitchen counter, even drips running down the white cupboard door.
"What the actual fuck!" I cry out as the pain fluctuated. Surely a paper cut wouldn't cause this much mess all over my kitchen.
Turning my hand around inspecting, a deep wound is sliced in the flesh of my right index finger, heavily oozing out with blood.
Hurrying over to the sink, I turn the tap on drowning my finger under the flow of water. The water is laced with thick blood as it runs down the drain. Looking around the kitchen all I can see is a dirty tea towel that I snatch from the side. I start to wrap the towel tightly around my finger, I'm a first aider at work so I'm grateful I know what I need to do. Elevating my hand to help stop the bleeding, I catch a glimpse of the blood-stained letter on the floor. I crouch back down and open it out.

'To her demise - In loving memory of Ada Rose'

Standing in the middle of the kitchen holding on to the note trying to breathe in air but it doesn't enter my lungs. My heart races at a tremendous speed but my lungs feel starved as I remember to take a breath. I stood there for what felt like an eternity but was actually only five minutes.
  How did he have the chance to put it here. It's a perfect place. He wanted me to find the letter so what better place to put it then amongst the takeaway menus.
What does it even mean? Something ominous hangs in the air as the words play on my mind.
Looking down at the envelope, I see something silver shining under the kitchen light. It's a razor. A very sharp fucking razor. Why would Alex do such a thing. The razor was put there with the intention to hurt me and that it did. I need to go A&E.
I can feel the panic rising from the pit of my stomach. I cannot concentrate on anything else that I'm doing. My heart hasn't stopped thumping out my chest, only faster now. I grab my phone and call Jaxon.
"Hello beautiful, I wasn't expecting to hear from you yet." He says cheerfully down the phone.
I can't tell him what's happened. The truth is just bonkers. How do I tell him that my extremely obsessive ex-boyfriend has somehow planted a letter that turned out to be a death threat and left in my kitchen drawer?
"Jax, I'm so sorry to disturb you at work but I really need your help." My panic was evident in my voice and Jaxon picked up on it straight away.
"Ade what's wrong?"
My brain is screaming to put the phone done and tell him I've called by mistake as I'm afraid this will scare him off.
"Would you be able to take me to A&E? I've cut my finger really bad. It hasn't stopped bleeding and I'm starting to feel a little light headed." Its half-truth having missed out the most important details.
"Fuck, of course. I will leave now. When you get off the phone to me, please eat or drink something sugary for your head. I've just got in my car. I'll be fifteen minutes." With the sound of his car door slamming shut and the engine thundering into action, I knew it wouldn't be long till he is here.
"Thank you. I'm so sorry" I apologise.
"You have nothing to be sorry for. I'm glad you thought you could call me. Anyway, get off the phone and eat something. I'm not far." Hanging up the phone, I do as he says and find a chocolate digestive biscuit.
I'm not ready for the outside world to see me and I can't change my clothes myself in case of blood spilling everywhere. I think about asking Jaxon for help when he gets here. Starting to feel a little woozy, I take a seat on the sofa whilst keeping my hand elevated wondering when my hands will stop trembling.
Some twenty minutes had past when the buzzer on the intercom sounds, forcing me out of my thoughts. Walking slowly over to the intercom and releasing the door downstairs, I put the latch on the door so Jaxon can let himself in. I'm desperate to sit back down. Jaxon bursts through the door out of breath running up the stairs taking two or three steps at a time, seeing me on the sofa he bolts towards me with concern.
"Oh Ade, your face has gone white." He tucks a strand of my hair behind my ears and then kisses me on the head. "Show me your finger." He orders.
Seeing the amount of blood soaked up by the dirty towel, he knew it was bad. I unravel the bloodied tea towel while Jaxon pulls out his first aid kit from out his ruck sack and frantically searches for fresh bandage.
He inspects the wound on my finger but no matter how much pressure Jaxon applied the blood gushed between my fingers and oozed under my hand.
"How the fuck did you do this? I think I can see bone" He applies a lot more pressure than I could manage then begins wrapping it with clean bandage, tying a knot at my knuckle. I don't know what to tell him and I'm not really sure what he will do if I do. I Should be honest with him, it goes against my nature if I am not. Trust is an essential part of any sort of relationship.
"I will tell you, but you have to promise me you won't get angry?" I begged.
Looking at me flummoxed. "Okay?" He answers.
"No, you have to promise me. You have to say it."
"Ade I promise you I won't get angry. Just tell me please" He replies worriedly.
"When I was looking through the takeaway menus last night I found a letter addressed to me. It come from Alex, it was his handwriting. I don't know how or when he put in there but It was only this morning that I remembered it was there, so I opened it." Sensing his displeasure when I mention Alex's name, he stands to his feet and paces the room in front of me.
"So, how does that explain your finger?" He questions.
The dread creeps over me like an icy chill. "I'll show you, you'll need to come to the kitchen."
Approaching the kitchen his mouth falls open. Never before has Jaxon seen such a sight like what he is about to see.
"It's like a fucking murder scene in here!" He follows the bloodied trail and notices the blood-stained letter and envelope on the kitchen floor.
Crouching down to pick up the letter and envelope I immediately stop him.
"BE CAREFUL!" I yell, launching myself at him swiping both the envelope and letter out from his hands back down to the floor. "There's a razor stuck inside the envelope."
Jaxon can't quite believe what I'm saying. Not that he doesn't believe me, more to the point that this is such a fucked-up situation and it's just an unbelievable thing to have to say.
He bends down to pick the envelope up with caution. He stands to his feet examining it, his face full of rage, I guess he's seen the razor.
"I know you don't want me be angry and I am trying not to be I promise but seeing you hurt like that just makes me so fucking mad." His breathing is heavy as he tries to swallow his anger. "What's this then?" He unfolds the letter and reads it out loud.
"'To her demise - In loving memory of Ada Rose.'"
Straightening up his back, his knuckles turning white as he clenches them on the edges of the kitchen counter. He doesn't say anything for a moment, words left him. He stares fixedly at the floor. I can tell he wants to say something, instead he looks over at the clock.
"We will talk about this later. Let's get you to the hospital and get that checked out." He advises.
"Erm... can you help me get changed first, please?" I stutter. I've never seen Jaxon's eyes look so hurt before.
"Of course, I will help you." Giving me half a smile.
There is no sound in the flat, yet we are both moving and not talking. He helps me into my grey Adidas tracksuit but I feel so dirty. I haven't showered yet nor have I cleaned my teeth which I quickly do. My hair was messy with clumps of dried blood on the ends and my cheeks and forehead also had dried blood smeared across them. Grabbing my bag and keys from the dining room table, we head towards the door and leave.
I follow Jaxon as he leads me to his brand-new black Audi A5. Opening up the passenger side door, he helps me into the car and fastens my seat belt. There are times when a bad day presents itself and then you wait to see what the universe and you can make of it; how can I make something good come out of something so very awful? Jaxon Is my something good, even after everything this morning, my skin tingled where he touches me, I can feel that I'm burning for him.
Jaxon was in the waiting area while I had just finished being triaged, walking the aisles of a selection of assorted chairs, some looking more comfortable than others. I find Jaxon seated in the corner.
"I think you need to go to the police Ade." He advises with a straight face as I sit down on the chair next to him. "I am trying so hard to keep my promise and not get angry and I will do my best to do that but you need to go to the police. What he did was criminal. It's something a psychopath would do. What if he has other plans to hurt you? If he messes with you again Ade, don't ask me not to get angry. He doesn't hurt you like that. You're my girl now." His hands tighten around my waste. He really does love me. 'My girl now', I just twitched a little.
"I don't want to go to the police Jax. I don't think I have it in me to do that. I know I should but I can't" Glancing upward, my mouth pursed but slightly open and loose. My eyes are fixed on the blank wall ahead trying to figure out how this all happened. "How did he do it that's what I want to kn..."
That's it, I've got it. I stand from the chair, Jaxon releasing his arms around my waste as realisation sets in. I know how he did it, I know how he planted the letter in my kitchen. I think my heart is going to explode and my eyes are wide with fear. My body wants to run fast for the hills but this is something I have to face. Goosebumps fill every inch of my skin as a cold chill runs down my spine.
"What's wrong?" He fusses.
"Oh Jaxon... It's possible that Alex let himself into my flat the morning of our date. I'd just got out the shower when I heard something hit the floor in my bedroom. So, naturally I went to check see what it was and that's when I see my phone on the floor. Before I showered, I left my phone on charge on the bedside table. Then when I picked up the phone it was already turned on and my messages were open. Specifically, on our messages. He would have had time to plant the letter whilst I was in the shower." Jaxon's muscles tense and I see the anger washing over his eyes as his earlier promises are now just empty words.
"And your telling me you won't to go to the police? Oh Ade, you understand now that I can't let you stay in that flat alone? That fucking twat. I knew it... When I first laid eyes on him I knew there was something not quite right about him. I've wanted to smash his fucking face in for so long." Growling under gritted teeth
"Why? Why so long?" I ask curiously.
"He was rude to you at your dad's birthday party, in front of everyone. I'll never forget that. He told you to be quiet because you were enjoying yourself and that you were embarrassing him... can you remember that? That's why me and Mase named him 'twat'."
Now I understand. That's the reason why they call him a twat, it all makes sense to me now.
"I feel so stupid. I never realised any of those things. I never realised how people felt about him until now. Alex and I, we weren't in a great place leading up to Christmas anyway. I've been more upset over the fact I've wasted five years of my life rather than his deceit. I stayed because of the company but then he wasn't great company to have. And now he's breaking into my flat." I slump myself back down on the chair head in hands wondering what I should so do.
To sum all this shit up; Alex is a raging lunatic and everyone knew except me. Even Gemma said she sensed something dangerous about him. I've been hiding behind my rose-tinted glasses for far too long.
"Will you stay with me for a few days until I talk to the landlord about changing the locks?" I ask.
He gives me a full beamed dimple smile, pulling me back into his arms. "One hundred percent. I will do anything to keep you safe."
After a two and half hour wait a nurse finally calls my name. Eight stitches and a trip to the chemist for prescription painkillers later we are finally able to leave the hospital.
Waiting in a long queue to pay for the car parking ticket, I notice a familiar face walking past me. It's my boss.
"Richard!?" I call out.
I saw the shock register in Richards face before he could hide it. The blood draining away from his face.
"Ada, what are you doing here?" His eyes wide open as shock is still plastered over his face.
"I had an accident. I have eight stitches on my finger." Screwing my face in pain, catching the bandage on my bag zipper.
"Christ Ada, that sounds awful! How did you manage that?" He says as very pretty little girl no older than four years of age or so pulls on his arm.
"I'll tell you another time. I can see you have your hands full." Watching the impatient child tugging harder on his sleeve.
"We are here to visit my wife. I best be off." Patting the little girl on the head. "Ada, take a couple of days off to mend. Speak later." He rushes off with his daughters' little legs running alongside him.
I didn't know his wife was in hospital but thinking about it, I don't really know much about him. These successful men are closed books.
Waiting patiently in the queue, Jaxon pays for the car parking and holds open the car park door for me.
"Sorry. That was my boss weirdly. He said to have a couple of days off to 'mend'." Sounding a lot more cheerful now, that was the pick-me-up I needed.
"Does that mean I can spend them with you?" He dances his eyebrows with a smile.
I laugh through my nose "I wouldn't have it any other way." I blush.
"I need to go back home and pack a bag. Shall we get a McDonald's and take it back to the flat?" Nodding my head, Jaxon drives out of the hospital car park. I can't help but notice all these people that either have appointments or visiting a loved one. They all look how I feel...anxious.