𝑺𝑶𝑳𝑺𝑻𝑰𝑪𝑬 [𝑯𝑨𝑹𝑹𝒀 𝑷𝑶𝑻𝑻𝑬𝑹/𝑻𝑾𝑰𝑳𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻]

𝑊𝐴𝑅𝑁𝐼𝑁𝐺𝑆

Rhea's advice plagued Gwen's mind throughout the night, into the early morning, and once more throughout the night. In truth, when speaking to Rhea she had first felt an anger that she knew had been brought on by the embarrassment she had felt by being spoken to so honestly. She hated being called out like that. She hated that Rhea could easily see her. Hardly anyone had ever been brutally honest with her like Rhea had been.

But then again, when Gwen took time to think about it...To really think about it, she understood what the Centaur was getting at.

Grief if left untreated, would cause more trouble down the line.

Which was true. Gwen was feeling it already. She could hardly sleep without a sleeping draft, afraid of drowning in her nightmares. She overindulged in alcohol when possible. She overworked herself to the point of not having to think of anything else. And she avoided.

She avoided and she was good at it. In fact, she excelled in it.

Because not avoiding and finally confronting what she needed to confront meant facing her fears. Her worst fears of two years...Of facing them, and possibly ending up alone forever.

And she was terrified.

Even the thought of what she had to do caused her to feel as though she could not breathe. It made her heart race and mind numb: Gwen was terrified that Hermione's parents would hate her. Terrified of facing Ron...Terrified of the plans Harry had for them; and what he would do if she did not agree with them.

But most of all, she was terrified of staying stagnant.

Life and her fears were actually quite funny if she thought about it for too long. Since she was 14 years old and watched the lifeless body of her boyfriend come out of the maze; she knew the rest of her life would be spent fighting a war. She didn't know how or why, but she never pictured herself surviving it. And when she came out of it, she was expected to just move on.

To just have a normal life; to fall in love, get married, have kids, and repeat the cycle.

But the war lingered beneath her skin. Sometimes, she still craved it. She craved the danger, the adrenaline...And she knew that no sane person craved those things...And so she was stuck.

"They died in their grief, and then they were reborn as new beings. Uplifted by their herd, their duty to the community. Sometimes it took years. Sometimes it took their entire life. Sometimes, some were not able to. But at least they tried."

Gwen sighed as she remembered Rhea's words, it would take a lifetime for her to heal. Maybe she wouldn't get there...But, receiving Rhea's blessing on going to Australia made it all the more real. It made her feel as though this really was the right choice, no matter how petrified it made her feel.

She was moving in the right direction, and that's all she could do...Right?

"Now, I thought the point of going out was getting pissed and not looking pissed" Alex complained, as he ordered another round for them as he moved his wavy overgrown blond hair from his face.

Gwen grinned as she realized she had completely been zoning out. Though Gwen had been back in England for a little over a month and Alex had moved in, they hardly had anytime together. With Gwen spending most of her days at her office and then spent a majority of the weeknights with Harry, not to mention Alex spent most of his days out in the Forbidden Forest.

But ever since her talk with Rhea, she had felt off with Harry. Maybe it was because she knew he was going to ask her for more soon, even though he had promised not to. Or maybe it was their upcoming trip...But something made her want her space. So, she found herself out with Alex. And the good thing about Alex, was that he didn't ask too many questions if it wasn't something he cared about.