Factory Reset | ✓

exist...?

Even after I thought I left the fake hotel, I was back in the white room again. When the rest of my memories returned, I remembered all the times I had been in rooms like this. All the times they tried to make me forget. All the times they tried to make me remember things that didn't happen.

The empty walls mocked me — reminding me that there was no escape. This was all I had and all I ever would have. There wasn't even a window or a bed in this room. No phone. Nothing.

"Aura?"

A voice called out, but when I looked around, I couldn't see anyone there. Was my mind just making up voices now? Was I that far gone that I was creating my own imaginary friends? It wasn't that far-fetched now that I remembered all the struggles I had gone through in life.

Ever since I arrived at The Sanctuary, reality had felt so fragile. I felt so fragile. I felt more broken in ways I couldn't even explain. It felt like I was damaged in a way even I couldn't understand. When I heard Mira came to this place to try and heal, I thought it would help me, too.

If only I could go back in time and stop myself from ever coming here. But, if I hadn't come here, there was a chance that I wouldn't be alive right now. At least here... I would be watched by someone. Though, I was starting to learn there were fates worse than death. This was one of them.

Suddenly, my body began to shake, but I didn't know why.

I wasn't cold. I wasn't shaking myself. It felt like someone else was shaking me, but when I checked again, no one was there. Was my body just acting up again? Was I not seeing something? What if I wasn't in the white room? What if this was my imagination acting up and torturing me?

The shaking continued, and I grew nauseated. I forced my eyes closed to try and see if this white room was real or another illusion. When I opened my eyes again, I was in a dark bedroom. Thick, heavy blankets covered my body. Mira was on top of me, gently shaking me awake.

"Aura?" she asked, dropping her arms to the side. She shifted her weight, so that her legs were on either side of me. "It was just a dream. It wasn't real. You're not there anymore."

I stared blankly at her, waiting for my mind to catch up with me. When did I get in bed with Mira? Did we live together? Was this reality? Or was this just me fantasizing about her again?

She leaned forward, her body hovering over mine. Her breath fanned against my ear. It felt like she was real, but brains were powerful things. Who is to say this wasn't just another illusion?

"It was just a dream," she whispered in my ear. "You're here with me, and you'll be okay."

Mira shifted over on the bed, but pulled me closer into her arms until we were cuddling. The familiar warmth I associated with her spread throughout my body, and I let her comfort me. I felt safe and protected when I was with her, but was I really with her right now? Was she real?

I cried into her shoulder, the broken feelings still lingering. I wanted this to be real more than anything, but I was filled with uncertainty. I wanted her more than I ever wanted anyone else.

"Please don't leave me," I mumbled into her shoulder. I knew it was vulnerable, but Mira had already seen every side of me. She knew how broken I was, and yet, she still stayed with me.

As if she heard, she held me closer like she was afraid to let me go — like I'd disappear. "You're here with me, and you'll be okay," she repeated. "You're here with me, and you'll be okay."

I closed my eyes tight, trying to savor the moment as much as I could. As long as I was with her, I'd be okay. As long as I was with her, I'd be okay. As long as I was with her, I'd be okay. As long—

The warmth was gone too fast, and I opened my eyes to her absence.

I lost her again. I kept losing her. Over and over and over again.