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Hope was a complicated spectrum. What was hope really? An expectation so high that we can only wish for it to happen? A want that ran ever so deep through the soul? A ray of sunlight to shine through your darkest day? Or was it an illusion played by the universe to mock you of something you crave madly?
Whatever it was, Kaz Brekker didn't want to do anything with it.
Kaz Brekker once had hope. He once had great expectations when he first sat foot in Ketterdam. Seeing the ports of the city of bustling hub for international trade and saying deep in the heart that it was 'a place of new opportunities'. Sometimes, it felt like yesterday when the child in Kaz Brekker was high as a kite as he hoped for all the lavish and sumptuous materials he would buy once he and Jordie elevate to the rich uppers.
But that was a child's dream.
Kaz Brekker realized that. It only took one swim—an intercourse with death—and the inner child of him drowned, pulled to the bottom of the sea by sirens—never to be seen again.
Since that day, for seventeen years of his life, Kaz Brekker never hoped. Where he believed that hope was a dangerous thing to lean on. It divides of which is reality and which is dream. A foolish thing to do in the business world—especially in Ketterdam. This is the cold world, not a pixy-warm fairytale.
"Why are you so gloomy all the time?" Anneke asked as her steps stopped just behind Kaz.
"Because." Kaz answered shortly, not bothering to see the anticipation on her face for him to continue.
"Because?" She urged.
"Because."
Although not facing the girl behind him, Kaz could feel her eyes roll out of the let down. Kaz felt a tug on his lips, but he didn't let it show. One thing for sure, Kaz Brekker was good at maneuvering everything, and that includes his own feelings.
"Shouldn't you be at home Anneke? I can hear someone screaming your name." Kaz looked at his shoulder, only to see Anneke shrugging, not caring the violent sound of her mother shrieking.
"Well, I was hoping you could hide me." Anneke smiled sheepishly, leaning on the heel of her foot as her hands clamped behind her back.
"I'm a businessman, Anneke. Not a kidnapper."
"Of course you're not. You can't be a kidnapper if you're a kid. That's just absurd." As the silent wind played hide and seek with her bright copper ringlets, Anneke laughed at her own statement. Crusty and dry as the desert sand, but the cherry headed girl found joy in it.
