One Last Time

7

The next morning, Kenma continued his normal, daily routine he had for a while now. As per usual, he logged on to stream in the afternoon.

He explained to the few viewers he had that he got caught up with things yesterday and was too busy to stream.

After the stream, he went on like he usually did and checked the viewers. Despite his disappearance yesterday, he still was losing views by the day. Frustrated, he threw his phone down. He rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands and sighed in anger. He then picked his phone back up and continued doing what he was doing.

He was fed up with everything. He hated how life was at the moment. He hated his career. He hated his mental state. He hated everything except for Kuroo. For Kenma, Kuroo was one of the few things that kept Kenma going every day.

Kenma let out a frustrated sigh and continued to play Warzone, although he wasn't streaming. He just played, not necessarily trying to be good or get wins, just doing it to use it as an escape from the reality he was trapped in.

By the time Kuroo got home, Kenma was still distracted on his game. He was unenthusiastically sitting at his desk, staring at the screen. He was mostly staring off and was playing using his instincts. He just sat there with an emotionless and blank stare.

Kuroo had come up behind Kenma and wrapped his arms around his shoulders. The sudden touch startled Kenma, which caused him to throw his headphones off and look back at Kuroo.

"Well hello my little gamer boy." Kuroo smiled when he saw Kenma's small face. Kenma just gave him the face he always gave, an annoyed glare, knowing that deep down he actually liked the pet names.

Kuroo sighed and let go of Kenma. "Are you hungry? Have you eaten yet?" He could tell that Kenma was a bit more on edge and moodier than usual, which most likely meant he hadn't eaten yet.

"No." Kenma spun around in his chair to face Kuroo, and then stood up. He pushed some of the hair that slipped from his bun behind his ears. He then walked over to the foot of the bed and sat down beside the cat. Kenma stroked his soft fur, looking up at Kuroo.

"Kenma. You haven't been eating much lately. Are you sure you're not hungry? I don't want you getting sick." Kenma could hear the concern in his voice and instantly felt guilty. He didn't mean to make Kuroo feel that way and definitely didn't want to worry him.

"I'll go grab something right now." He got up and walked out the door, Kuroo following behind him.

Kenma went to go make cup noodles. Kuroo prepared him a drink and also grabbed something for himself to eat. They both sat down together when they finished making their food.

Kenma tried to hurry up and stuff as much food as he could in his mouth. He hadn't realized how hungry he actually was until he started eating. As soon as he started to think about his hunger and how much he had actually eaten at that moment, he felt sick. He felt like he couldn't keep it down and ran to the bathroom without giving Kuroo a warning.

He knelt down in front of the toilet, his hand over his mouth. He felt like crying, but couldn't force the tears even if he wanted to. Less than seconds later, he could hear Kuroo running after him.

"Kenma! Are you okay??" Kenma could feel Kuroo's warm and gentle touch on his shoulder. He just leaned his head back into Kuroo's leg and nodded his head as he did so.

"Kenma, are you sure? You already look a bit better but.. are you sure you're okay?" Kenma could hear the concern in Kuroo's voice and felt bad for the trouble he caused him. He felt like a burden and like it was his fault for the way his life was turning out to be. He felt like if he hadn't been with Kuroo for so long, Kuroo would've already left him for someone else.

"Mhm." Kenma mumbled his answer and turned to face Kuroo. He wrapped his arms around Kuroo's knees and leaned his forehead into his lower thigh. He felt as if it was his fault for everything that happened, even though he knew it wasn't.

Almost reading Kenma's thoughts, Kuroo spoke up. "KenKen. It's not your fault. Come on. Let's try and finish your food." He reached his hand down to Kenma, offering to pull him up.

Kenma took his hand and stood himself up in front of Kuroo. Afterward, Kuroo then pulled Kenma into a warm, comforting hug. "Kenma... What's wrong? You haven't been as excited as normal. You know you can tell me anything KenKen."

Kenma leaned into the hug, enjoying his comfort. "I don't know, Kuroo. Just a lot of things. First, the major decrease in views and second the fact that I can hardly even live my life normally. I cant even eat. You saw me."

"Kenma... don't worry about money or your career. I can provide for the both of us. It might be a bit tougher, but trust me, I can. I promise. Let's try to finish your food before it gets cold."

Kuroo tried to end the hug, but Kenma continued to lean more into it. He gripped onto the sides of Kuroo's shirt, not wanting to leave. "Kuroo... I can't. I really can't. It's just going to make it worse." Kenma could feel his voice shaking, although Kuroo didn't hear it.

"Okay. Do you want to take your mind off of it? We can play a game or watch TV. Your choice. Or something else if you want." Kuroo had started to gently brush his hands through Kenma's hair, a habit he had picked up when they were together. Although he never told him so, he subconsciously knew it helped comfort Kenma when he felt this way.

"Mhm." Kenma loosened his grip on Kuroo's shirt and started leading him out of the bathroom. He switched the light off as he headed off toward their bedroom.

"Kuroo... can we just sit here. And talk." He sat down cross-legged at the foot of the bed, looking up at Kuroo. "Of course KenKen. Do you want to talk about anything in particular, or just talk?" Kuroo sat down to the left of Kenma and started to gently rub his back.

"Just... talk, I guess." He leaned into Kuroo's shoulder, starting to feel drowsy when he did so. He closed his eyes, hoping to just rest them, but found himself sleeping moments later.