always forever ☆ sunny suljic.

stop thinking about me

- - - - - - - - - - y/n pov.

sunny left my house pretty late. neither of my parents found out that he had been in my room, which was great. i was now sitting on my bed, thinking. his scent was still lingering over the place. i opened my phone with a smile on my face, and started adding some songs to the playlist i was making him. some time later, i sent him the link. my heart was racing, and i fell asleep thinking of what he would reply.

the next day, i walked to school slower than usual. it was sunny outside, so i thought i would take the long route and enjoy the weather. my detour meant i was gonna be late to first period, which was english, so i didn't stress over it. i was walking through the park that separated my house from the street of the school, when i pulled out my phone. i saw a notification from sunny, but i didn't want to open it just yet. instead, i opened instagram, only to be met with a new post from estee. there was nothing particularly weird, except for sunny being tagged. i told myself to not overreact, even though my heart dropped a little. i had to trust him and his words, that's the least i could do.

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walking on the empty halls of the school gave me a weird satisfaction. it was peaceful, quiet. i was about to go up the stairs when i heard my name being called.

'what are you doing here?' sunny asked, looking at me up and down. 'i could ask you the same thing', i replied. 'i was listening to your playlist and i lost track of time.' i couldn't help but smile. he's so cute it annoys me sometimes. i could tell by his expression that he's still sleepy. it was time i did the first impulsive and probably stupid thing today, so i leaned in, 'whoever gets upstairs last has to give the other one 10 dollars', but before he could start running, i pressed my lips onto his quickly. i then turned around and ran up the stairs as fast as i could, still not believing my own actions. obviously, i was first. 

'what took you so long sun boy?' never underestimate how much confidence you can gain in one day. 'not fair, you distracted me!' he rolled his eyes and handed me the 10 dollars. his hand stopped over mine for a while. i shoved the money in my jacket's pocket and opened the classroom door, 

'miss y/n! perfect timing! you brought sunshine with you too' our teacher motioned us to sit, looking very proud of his joke. 'what did you think of the book?' he asked. it now hit me, i should've just ditched. we were studying romeo and juliet.

'mixed feelings' i answered shortly, hoping he wouldn't push me to say more. sunny sat down at his usual spot, next to estee. i wasn't in the mood to talk. a part of me wanted to get up and  shove sunny into the seat next to mine, but i couldn't do that. 'i think it was great! the love story we ALL want to live' estee butted in. i glanced at her and she was looking at sunny. she kept talking about how perfect they are, but i was distracted by my phone.

sunny : what are you gonna buy

i looked back up, the teacher was still listening to estee.

y/n : ur gfs onlyfans

i chuckled silently to myself, then closed my phone. i interrupted estee's speech, feeling like my head would explode if i heard her say romeo is the best man one more time, 'but they're not real. their feelings and their love story - they're not real. why glorify that? you can't expect your relationships to be like something that isn't, well, real.' 

'they're soulmates. when someone loves someone else enough, they'd do anything for them!'

i turned my head to look at her, she had her head resting against sunny's shoulder. that angered me more, 'there's no such thing as soulmates! people are just using that because they know their usual relationship isn't enough to keep them together!' i said, trying really hard to deny the fact that i was jealous. at this point,  that damn post from earlier popped in my mind. 'just because you have never experienced a relationship doesn't mean it's fake!' she said, smirking in satisfaction at my annoyed expression. 'and just because YOUR relationship is shit and you can't make your boyfriend stay with you unless you say you're soulmates, doesn't make it FUCKING REAL!' i raised my voice, getting up because of the adrenaline rush.

'y/n l/n! calm down, please! we appreciate different points of view, but they must be said respectfully! detention!'

i sat back down. i felt like an idiot for letting her play me just the way she wanted to, but it was impossible not to get annoyed. can you really blame me? if sunny wouldn't have pulled a romeo yesterday MAYBE, just maybe, i wouldn't feel like this today. the bell rang after what felt like forever and i rushed out of the classroom. the next two classes passed by quickly, and i found myself walking on the hallways hurriedly again, hoping to avoid estee at all costs.

guess who i bumped into on the hallways though? ryder.

relief washed over me as i looked up to see his forever calm expression. i swear if i could wrap the whole world in gift paper, i would give it to him, no hesitation. we walked to the cafeteria, talking about random things.

we eventually sat down at a table. my hands were shaking and i wished, for a brief second, sunny would be here to hold them and make me feel good again. julie made her way to us, and she looked excited. well, more excited than usual, 'did you hear about the party?'

'what party?' me and ryder asked at the same time. 'the pool party gio is throwing later today! he PERSONALLY invited me and asked me to tell you, also' she let out a squeal of happiness. never thought i'd see julie crush over gio, but here we were. 'sooo are you going?' i asked, already anticipating the answer. 'only if you come! i'm not facing all that on my own'. i honestly didn't want to go. i don't like pools, i don't like being almost naked around so many people and i certainly can't stand seeing estee all over sunny again. my face and knuckles are still healing, can't afford another fight. but, i had to be a good friend. julie actually likes me, and i need her to know i appreciate it, 'uhh fuck it, sure. but i'm not gonna wear a swimsuit'

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me, julie and ryder agreed to go together to the party. i had to get out of detention first though. i thought i'd be the only one enduring hell, but to my surprise, someone else was there too. you already know who it is.

'this is because of you' he said, 'i can't fucking stop thinking about you'. my heart stopped for a second. that was my intention, but it's weirdly intense to actually hear it come from another person. i made my way to his place and sat on the desk. 'awe, it's completely normal to have wet dreams at this age, it means you're maturing' i said mockingly, playing with my fingers. i turned my head to look at him, but he had already gotten up. he was quite tall, imposing maybe. the image of him sitting on my bed yesterday entered my mind.

'i mean it, dummy' he finally spoke, sitting in-between my thighs, 'i really like you'. he said that so lightly that i thought it was just in my head for a second. i felt the tension rise up between us, the instant those words left his mouth. that was my cue, so i leaned in, just like this morning, except i kissed him hard this time - like my life was depending on it. our mouths moved in sync, the distance between us becoming smaller and smaller. his hands snaked around my waist and i wanted to melt in the moment. we kissed yesterday and this morning and in the ice cream shop two days ago, but now it felt different - like there was nothing that could possibly stop us...

except the teacher meant to supervise us. fuck, how come we always get interrupted. i sat down, frustrated. sunny did too, embarrased. we all sat in silence, looking at one another.

'you know what? get lost kiddos' she said, smiling awkwardly, 'go on'. we got up, thanked her and left. it was confusing, but i was happy that i was out of there. sunny and i walked in silence. i don't know about him, but the last minutes before the teacher came in kept replaying over and over again in my mind.

'are you coming?' i heard him ask, interrupting my thoughts. 'huh?'

'to the party? later today?' he looked at me, i nodded. the sun was still up as we were walking together. we ended up at the crossroad of my street and his, 'i'll see you there then', he hugged me tightly. when he pulled away, he lifted my head by my chin with one of his hands and i thought he was going to kiss me, but instead, he just stopped a few centimeters away from my lips, 'don't think about me too much' he said plainly and then went on his way.

'see you there sun boy' i shouted, flipping him off as he was getting further. i was trying really hard to convince myself that i won't think about him too much.

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a/n : guess who's back 😩 i'm so tired from school, i keep trying to write during my boring classes but i end up getting distracted :") im really excited for the next chapter tho ;) anw hope u enjoyed and have a great day !!