.: TW: Sui*idal thoughts, and attempts:.
I couldn't feel anything...
My skin was numb from the cold...
Inside, there was also nothing.
All I could focus on was the echoing void within me, and how he looked at me as if he didn't just destroy me.
My own husband, the man who vowed to protect me had become the very thing I needed protected from.
I laid there, motionless, as he buckled his belt around his waist. I could hear him speaking, but could barley make out the words.
It was as if my head was under water, anything he said sounded faded, and far away.
"Sybil!" He said, roughly, nudging my hip with his boot.
"I said, Go, and get cleaned up!" He yelled.
Somewhere inside me, I found the strength to move. My body ached all over, as I stood upright. He flopped down on the couch, satisfied, as he lit a cigarette.
"Go." He said again.
All I could do was nod.
What could I say?
What was there to say?
He offered me nothing, no coat, no covering of any kind, I walked up those stairs exposed, violated, at that point I hoped the cold would take me before I made it to the bathroom.
Sadly, though, I couldn't hope to be so fortunate.
I couldn't feel my fingers as I turn on the hot water, the pipe on the wall began to steam and glow with a red hue.
Warmth.
I held my breath as I let the heat of the water overtake me. The contrast of the temperature of the water and my skin was almost painful. Perhaps my body would go into shock if I were lucky.
"Why weren't you there?" I began to sob, softly, finally feeling some emotion.
I was hurt, more so at Thomas than August.
I thought back to the night before, and the more that I thought about it the more absurd it seemed.
He wasn't there because he doesn't exist.
I made him up, an imaginary comfort that my subconscious created so that I may be able to stand this hell I'm in. I'm truly alone... I laid back in the tub and covered my face with my hands, sobbing uncontrollably.
Thomas's face kept flashing through my mind, his smile, the sound of his voice, I laid there for a while and imagined him with me, comforting me. Lord, what I'd give to be with him, to be held in his arms.
The only true embrace that I can see myself in is within the arms of death.
It's the only foreseeable way out.
I closed my eyes, all it would take is for me to let it happen.
I lied back in the tub, submerging my head.
This is it.
I focused all my thoughts on Thomas, real or not, I wanted my last memory to be of something beautiful.
I love you, Thomas...
I opened my lungs, allowing the water to spill inside.
"Sybil, No!" I felt myself jolt upright, someone had hold of me. I fought against them.
"Let me go!" I choked, water forcing itself out of my mouth as I thrashed against the arms that held me.
"Sybil! Sybil! Stop!"
Thomas?...
He grabbed my face tenderly with his hands, I could feel them as if they were real.
No more prickles or odd sensations. Am I in heaven?
I opened my eyes to look at him, his expression was horrified, as tears welled up in his eyes.
"Not here....not in this place..." he sighed, pushing my hair away from my face with one hand.
"Oh...Thomas!" I cried, throwing my arms around him as he pulled me from the tub and onto his lap in the floor.
"Thomas he...he..." I choked through hysterical sobs.
"I know...." he seethed.
"I saw..."
"Why didn't you help me! Why!?! Why did you let him hurt me!?" I cried into his chest.
"I couldn't stop him. I swear to you I tried....I tried...." he buried his face in my hair as he held me, rocking me gently.
Minutes passed by as we sat in silence, just holding one another.
He was my peace.
My everything now.
"I don't know what's happening, Thomas..." I sighed, beginning to calm down a bit.
"I'm so tired..." I whimpered, laying all my weight against him.
"I know, darling...of course you are, after all you've been through."
I felt him rising off the ground, carrying me close to him.
"Sleep now..." he said, softly as he carried me to my room.
I can't remember much of what happened next. Except that I was laying in bed, dressed and covered, fighting off the sleep that beckoned me.
"I don't want you to go..."
"I'm never gone, Sybil. I'm always with you even if you can't see me. I'm right here..." he said gently. I could see that he was fading away.
"Thomas?...."
"I'm here, darling...Always..."
YOU ARE READING
Crimson Lace: A Crimson Peak love story (Thomas Sharpe)
Paranormal*COMPLETED* Sybil McMichael was happy to accompany her husband, August, to the place his grandmother, Edith Sharpe, wrote about in her most famous Novel. Once there, she finds that her husbands intentions were fueled by more than mere childhood curi...
