Then_And_Now_CHAPTER03
Summer 2012
After I heard Mika and Yoongi's conversation the last time, I started avoiding Mika. I can't blame Yoongi liking her, she's very innocent and she's beautiful. While me? I am just a nobody. She was the reason why me and Yoongi became close. And now I know why, it's because HE likes HER. And that's so hard to understand.
I'm still in Gwacheon, my brother and I stayed here in Jin's house. I have seen Yoongi earlier but I didn't greet him. I know he was confused because it's the first time that I haven't greeted him, but why do he cares anyway? Again, I just like him. But he don't to me.
I flinched when the door suddenly opens, and Jin enters. "Yah! Why would you barged in just like that to a lady's room?! What if I'm changing my clothes?!" I hissed at him. He walked like he did not hear anything and sat beside me on the sofa.
"Yoongi's here. Did....something happened the last time at the LP store? Mika is looking for you too." I sighed at him, I don't want to answer his questions, because first it's me who's overreacting, and second it's me who didn't confront to Mika. She must be so worried to me. I was hurt, and I don't want to talk nor see them. I always remember what happened if I'll have a glance at them.
"By the way, let's eat now. Mom asked me to accompany you downstairs and eat. She said you haven't eat anything on breakfast." his worried voice laced as he talks. "You have no rights to keep my mom worried about you! I'm the son here Jisoo, and you're just a sister of my best friend!" he suddenly shouted dramatically while holding his chest as if he's hurt. I laughed at him.
That's what I observed, his parents really are great in accommodating both me and my brother, and he would always scold his mom, because he haven't experience those sweet gestures from his mom.
"That's what I've been missing this past few days." I arched my brows, confused to what he said. "I've been missing that smile and laugh." he then ruffled my hair and I slap off his hands away. I tsked at him and began walking out of my room. He followed from behind and jogged to me so we can go together to their dining.
As soon as we arrived I was stunned to see the two people sharing the silence of the room. When Mika saw me, she stood up and waved her hand.
"Let's eat together Jisoo. They missed you." Jin whispered beside me. "Okay so now we are complete! Sit down Mika, you don't have to stand and greet her like that, she's not a queen of this house, I am!" Jin used his cheerful voice to brighten all our moods. I composed myself and walked near my usual seat.
"So you are saying you're a queen?" I tried to sound happy while joking to Jin. I sat beside him while the two were sitting across us. Mika sat as soon as I sat down. She served me some foods and I thanked her.
I set aside what I'm feeling and tried to be jolly like what I truly am.
"You have something to say Yoongi, right?" Jin and I looked at Yoongi when Mika talk. He slowly put down his chopsticks like he's preparing.
I put down my hands underneath the table and I rolled my fist. Are they going to reveal that they are dating? I hope not.
"That seemed like it's really important huh? You're taking too long to talk." I nervously said. I saw from my peripheral view that Jin nodded, agreeing to me.
"Well there's someone I like and..." he pauses for a while, and sighed deeply. "I wanna ask her out."
"Really?!" Jin asked in horror. He was so shocked to hear it. While me all I have is a blank expression. Just like what I expected. "Who's the unfortunate girl?" Jin asked trying to joke around so we would laugh but we were covered with silence.
"It's..." it was so hard for him to say who it was, my hands are sweating now, and I can't just stop my feet from stomping. "It's Jisoo." my heart dropped at the sound of my name from his mouth. I don't know how to react. I blink a couple of times trying to register what he said.
All of us were silent. And then there's Jin who suddenly stood up and invite Yoongi outside. He wants to talk with him alone. I was left with Mika.
"Aren't you happy... Jisoo?" she asked. I scratched my brow and look at her.
"Why me?"
"You like him all along Jisoo." she said.
"But you like him too." it was almost a whisper, she was taken aback to what I said. But she smiled.
"Of course not. It was you, and I'm happy for the two of you." I really want to be happy too, but why am I feeling like I've just taken the happiness away from my friend.
"Here." She handed me the LP CD that I left the last time. "You forgot to bring it, I want to give that to you last time, but then Jin's parents told me you're busy." I saw a glints to her eyes. I know that she wants to cry but she is still smiling.
After then, I just stayed quiet until the two guys came back from their talk. And I was surprise when Yoongi sat beside me and Jin across me.
"He will court you." my eyes widen to what Jin said. That fast? I haven't even think about what he said! "Okay I'll tell you what will be my plan this summer.....umm...I'll stay here in Gwacheon for a while, but I'll fly to Seoul by June, I was being scouted by Big Hit Entertainment. I'll be an idol." my heart panged when Jin said that, I feel like I will lose the only person who stayed by my side.
"Well, I'll be going to America." all our gazes went to Mika. Yoongi was affected I know that, he balled his fist like he's mad and he just keep his feelings hidden. Jin just nod at her and he looked at me, his brows rose up.
"I... I'm done eating." I walked away from the dining and hurriedly went back to the guest room upstairs. I locked myself inside and sat on the floor near my bed. I cried out my feelings.
Why am I feeling like this? I feel like this all happened because of me. Because of how I treated and reacted to everything.
Now that Yoongi said that he likes me, why am I not happy? Why am I hurting? Now that Jin is leaving, why can't I support him and be happy for him? And now that Mika is going back to her family, why am I feeling left out?
"Jisoo?" I heard Jin's voice from outside but since he's the owner of this house, he unlocked my door and all I did was covered my face so he won't see my tear stained face.
"Hey, it's not suitable for you to cry, you look like an ugly doll." He joked and giggled as he sat on the bed.
"I didn't know he likes you...but I know he likes someone. You're lucky to have him. And you look great as a couple." he sincerely said. I lifted up my gaze at him. He wiped off my tears away, and sat on the floor now.
"I know that you're feeling sad because I'm leaving." he said and I rolled my eyes at him.
"You bet. It's not because of you, just so you know!" I told him.
"I'm just lighting up the mood. Because I know it will never be me."
My brows furrowed but I shrugged it off.
"Just like him Jisoo, but don't you ever waste yourself to get his attention." I nodded at him. And then he hugged me. "All I can give you now is embrace. Because for now it's his turn to love you." I didn't get what he said or am I just over thinking? "His plan is to court you and it shattered me to pieces." it was a soft whisper but I still heard it, even the pain lingering on his voice.
