nine things || lrh

Ninth Thing

I re-entered our bedroom.

Mine.

On top of the cupboard which was standing by the window, was lying a plastic bag with Luke's things in it. I guess so far you've found out what happened.

And if not, I can tell you now.

Luke is dead.

The things in the bag, are the things he had with him at the time of the accident.

They were covered in his blood. That's all I have left of him.

Memories and bloody clothes. Fate can be perfidious, you must admit it.

Was it a punishment? I'm not sure about it myself.

Maybe in a way, but that didn't justify anything.

It was unfair.

I didn't open it before. They gave it to me at the hospital a few minutes after the doctor said that Luke's heart is no longer beating.

Mine probably stopped at that moment as well.

I opened the bag and poured the contents onto our (my) sheets.

My eyes were burning with hot tears. I hugged his jacket, inhaling the scent of gasoline mixed with his favorite perfume.

Something fell to the floor. 

I stifled my tears as I looked down.

Black box. The universe is playing with me? Or is it my eternal bad luck stand behind this? Or maybe this whore called fate?

With trembling hands, I picked it up and opened the box.

Ring with a shiny crystal.

Now I was sure.

༻✧༺

"Where are you going?"

I saw him putting his shoes on. He couldn't leave me alone with them.

"I have to do something quickly"

I was holding large white plates. I looked into his eyes.

That innocent smile creeps onto his lips.

"I'm freaking out, and you're running away? They should be here soon. Can't you do it after dinner or even tomorrow?" I walked over to him.

"Relax in 30 minutes max, I'll be back" he laughed.

He fixed his jacket.

"They're just your parents" he brushed away a lock of my hair.

His optimism.

"I haven't spoken to them since high school. Do you think I'm doing right thing reconnecting with them? What if it's a flop? You know my mother doesn't like you. She fucking hates you"

"Take a deep breath. Take it easy honey. We're in this together" he took my face in his warm hands.

He seemed so alive. Excited.

He brushed my lips with his.

Charming.

My charmer.

"Did you hear?" he let go of me.

He walked over to the door looking out the window next to it.

"Oh god they came"

"Really? Oh no. They're too early "

Panic.

Fear.

His smile. One of those saying "I'm just fucking with you"

"I hate you" I smiled looking at his beaming face.

"I love you too" he took the car key.

He left.

༻✧༺

Forever. I never thought this was going to end.

That this is the last time.

Last time.

The last time I saw him alive.

Last time I saw his smile.

How he looked at me.

How his blue eyes shineed.

Last time.

My legs softened. I fell to the floor, the box dropping from my hands.

He wanted to propose to me.

I wanted to do it in the jacket in which he was taking his last breaths.