Love Chromosomes

II. Who Are You?

V

"Tell me why are you breaking up with me again?" The smaller person started asking as soon as he sat opposite me in the school cafeteria.

It was the first day of the semester at our university. I am now in my third year in the faculty of Architecture while this guy in front of me is in his second year pre-med course.

His name is Masa Masahiro, half Thai, half Japanese, and my soon to be ex boyfriend.
I started dating this guy three months ago when I got too tired of rejecting his persistent advances again and again until I decided to just give it a try. He came to me first when he was a freshman and confessed his love right away after winning the competition for the most handsome freshmen in the whole university.

Yes, this guy is the Moon of the faculty of Medicine and the University. How can he not capture everyone's hearts when his personality is brighter than the sun? Masa's smile alone can make his fanclub go wild. His physique was just right, slim body and well proportioned with a face that is a combination of handsome and cute at the same time. From what I know, Masa is half Japanese. And the mixture of two races gave his face real justice. Beautiful to simply put it in words.

I owned the title of the University Moon before his year so I was partly incharge of the contest last year thus making the two of us meet. Apparently, he'd been crushing on me ever since the first day but all I ever wanted was a senior to a junior kind of relationship.

I have been dating girls all my life and I can't see a relationship with him no matter how good looking he is. But the pressure from other people especially from our now fused fc's have gotten into my head which pushed me to finally give it a chance, thinking loving someone like Masa wouldn't be that difficult right?

I tried my best in that three month trial period but I just can't. I never felt any physical attraction towards the guy. We never let alone kiss, not even on the cheeks. I like how Masa respected me in that aspect saying he will wait for the time I would finally open my heart to him.
But I doubt it'll ever happen.

When he went to Japan for a vacation last month, I finally gathered all my courage to tell him to break it all off through a line message. I even told him an excuse that I'll be getting myself a girlfriend, which was not entirely a lie though.

He never replied. So I texted him again yesterday, asking him for a talk. He just replied with an "Ok" and that's it.

I thought it was a little strange because Masa is the type of person who always replies with lengthy messages. But then I considered the fact that he must be in shock with my sudden decision, that's why he was acting like this. I even readied a box of tissue with me in case he started crying.

"I won't be able to love you Masa. I tried but..."

"Was I the one who confessed first?" He cut me off leaning slightly forward, his pretty eyebrows creasing. I don't know why he's asking me this. How can he forget something with such importance?

"Uhm, yeah? Anyway what I was trying to say is..."

"Hmmm... Interesting." I wasn't able to continue what I'm about to say when I saw him leaning back against the chair as he rubs his chin with his right thumb. It's as if he finds the idea of him confessing to me first, quite - odd.

"Look nong, I have always been honest with you about this. All I wanted for the two of us to have is a senior-junior bond. I don't want to continue making you hope for something that could never be." I blabbed trying my best to sound more gentle and sincere.