Survival

Part 7

If I would go back I would not do it again.

I would not do it again for anything in the world.

But in that moment, I decided to do it.

I decided to give him a chance. Problems started quite soon, but maybe I needed a distraction, the lesser pain for not thinking about that bastard.

I still remember the first time I blocked him after I decided to give him a chance. I posted a picture. I had a revealing t-shirt. I have the right to post pictures with revealing clothes. But he never had the right to take advantage of that. 

"In this moment I would really like to lay my head on boobs and yours are really big"

After I blocked him, he deleted the message. Maybe he realised, too late, what he wrote. He never had the right to write it. Everyone told me that I was overreacting. I should have never unblocked him. 

How can you say something similar to a girl? In that period, I still felt uncomfortable in my body. That message destroyed me. But it was not the worst thing.

After a while decided to go out with him. We had two dates. The first one was amazing. The second one was horrible. He touched me. In the car, he held my hand. It may seem a small thing, but I did not want to. I was alone with him and his stepdad. I could not do anything.

He touched me. He put his arm round my shoulders. He touched me. In the recess of the arm when my arm was too close to my breast. I suddenly removed the hand. But I was scared.

He touched me. He caressed my cheek. He wanted to kiss me. He touched me. He held my hand again. He touched me. He put his hand that was still holding mine on my thigh. Too close to where I did not want to.