You're not him-Loki x fem!reader

Prologue

"Loki, promise me you'll stay alive, don't be stupid." you said to your accident-prone lover.

"Darling,  we both know there's nothing to worry about, Thor and Valkyrie have a plan, we're not going to die, and who knows? Maybe after this we can go back to Earth, you have missed your family."

"Loki, I'm looking out for you here ok? Please stay alive. I don't what I'd do without you, you're way to important to me...and to Thor."

"Love, don't worry" he said kissing your forehead gently, he only did that to calm you down.

" Don't be stupid, and yes, we will mostly be going there and I'm looking forward to having a cheeseburger so don't ruin it for me by dying!"

"Ok, I won't die." He said

"Promise"

"I promise I won't die" he said chuckling softly. 

Liar, he didn't keep his promise, he didn't stay alive, he had to go ruin his life by dying and while doing that he managed to rip your very soul apart. Leaving a hole that would never be filled.

"LOKI NO!!!" you scream, while he's being choked by the heartless asshole of a Purple-grape.

All you hear is a sickening crack and that's when you knew, that your best friend, your companion, your lover, your LIFE was dead, never to come back to life again.

"No resurrections this time." the Titan said. Dropping the corpse of your lover whilst maliciously grinning like a madman. 

You zoned out after that, only able to stare at Loki. His corpse, hideously discolored, with his nose bleeding and his  eyes popped out.

"You didn't keep your promise.. YOU DIDN'T KEEP YOUR DAMN PROMISE ! YOU LIED TO ME" you screamed at the body, sobbing uncontrollably.

All you remember was a blast and then 

.

.

.

. silence.

~~

After Loki died, you started researching and learning of any possible way to bring him back, and that's when you heard about the TVA.

A lot of paperwork later, and you were officially a TVA agent.

You couldn't bring back Loki, but you could at least take your mind off him by drowning yourself in your work.

That all changed the day, your family, The Avengers contacted you again.

~~

The battle was over,  the Titan was dead.

 There were a lot of slip-ups, one that included a certain God of mischief escaping with the tesseract, way before you even met him.

Honestly, it didn't surprise you that he took it, he really loved that thing for some reason.

Tony and the rest of the Avengers were celebrating,  Thankfully Nat was fine, she got stuck on Vormir and had taken a few hours to come back. Thor had spent a few days with you and then left with the Guardians. After making Valkyrie queen.

How  were you doing?

To put it simply, Terrible. All the grief from the past five years suddenly came crashing down on you and that's when you realized your situation.

The love of your life was dead, never to come back. No more lazy mornings, no more impromptu dances, no more head-kisses. Ever.

~~

"Y/n, I know what you're going through is hard, but you can't keep doing this, you're practically living on beer!  Don't do what Thor did, you know what happened." Valkyrie told you one day.

"Val, I don't need anyone looking after me, I'm fine! Totally fine! I don't know why my voice sounds so loud and squeaky, because really I'm fine." you argued.

"Uh-huh, ok." she said dryly and left.

" I'll probably make some Fajita's later!!" you called out.

~~

Steve was an asshole, leaving his best friend like that, all to get some action from a woman he kissed over 70 years ago.

Like couldn't he have moved on?

God you were such a hypocrite.

You had to go back to work, Mobius, your partner and friend needed you, some variant was killing minutemen and he needed your help.

So you had to leave.

And so you left.

Bidding goodbye, to your family, you then teleported back to TVA Headquarters.