An Echo in the Wind

Chapter 22

"So, you and Shade," Carly's voice comes through my phone. 

I giggle, "Yeah."

Sophie grins, "I knew it. You owe my ten bucks Carls."

I gape, "You guys bet on whether Shade and I would get together?"

She shakes her head, "No. Technically we bet on when you'd get together.  I bet you'd get together before Halloween. Carly said you'd get together around Christmas time because it's the most romantic season."

"Christmas isn't a season," I say. 

Carly waves me off, "It's a saying."

I laugh. I hear the door slam downstairs. I sigh, "I think my mom just got home. I'll talk to you guys in school tomorrow."

They nod and I hang up. I get off my bed, in only my t-shirt and pajama shorts. 

She shouts from downstairs, "Hey assholes! Where the fuck are you?"

Crap. She's so drunk. I walk over to Austin's room. He's sitting on his bed, tucked under his covers. He was asleep, but his eyes search for mine in the dark now. I turn on his night table light and whisper, "It's just mommy. I'm going to talk to her. I'm going to lock the bathroom door to your room and I want you to lock your bedroom door too, okay?"

He nods and gets out of bed to lock the door. I stand in the doorway of the bathroom and before I leave, I say, "I need you to stay in here, okay? Promise me. No matter what you hear, you don't leave. Got it? And do not open the door unless it's me. I'll lock the bathroom door and when I leave I want you to put a chair against it, under than doorknob so it can't be opened from the outside."

"I understand," he whispers, tears pricking his eyes. This isn't a new routine. He knows how Mom gets when she's really drunk. Especially towards him. She'll go for him first. I won't let her get to him. 

I place a kiss on his forehead and leave the room, locking the door behind me. I go through my room and downstairs cautiously. 

My mom sees me immediately, "Hey! Where's that other stupid kid. He needs to get out of my house. He's a murderer. He killed my husband."

I shake my head, "No. Dad did that to himself. It was no one's fault but his own."

She shakes her head, "No it's that stupid brats fault. If he weren't born, we never would've had any problems."

"I'm going to get you help Mom. You need to go back to rehab. You can't keep drinking like this."

She chucks the bottle at my head and I duck but not quick enough. It slams against the side of my head, glass shattering and slicing my temple. At least it missed the majority of my face. 

She looks at me with angry eyes and I say, "You're sick Mom. Really sick. You need help. I'll get you help."

Instead of agreeing, she says, "I should get Derek out of prison. He'll kill Austin for me. He knows how to after all."

A sob escapes my mouth at the cruel words that just came out of hers. Tears gather in my eyes. My lower lip wobbles, and my voice cracks, "How could you say something like that? He's your son. He's just a little kid."

"He's no son of mine. He's a murdering bastard. I hate him. He's the reason all our lives are messed up. I don't know why you try to protect him so much. He screwed up your life too."

"He needs someone to protect him. No one else is going to. I love him, he needs to be loved. Look what happened to Derek. You can't honestly tell me you want another kid to turn out like him."

She sniffles, "No. But I do want my other son gone. And right now you're standing in my way."

"Mom you don't want this. You're just upset."

"You're not perfect either Echo. Don't act like you're so much better than the rest of this family."

I scoff, "I'm not trying to-"

"You think you can just swoop in and raise the kid like he's yours. Well guess what. He isn't. He's mine. And you're stealing him from me. You're telling him bad things about me so he'll be scared of me and it's not fair. I'm his mother and he should love me more than his slut of a sister. I saw what you were wearing when you came home today you little whore."

"I'm a virgin," I state, "And if you wanted him to love you like a mother, then maybe don't talk about murdering him or getting our psychopathic rapist of a brother to do it for you. You're starting to act so much more like him every day Mom. I don't even recognize the woman I grew up with. She's gone. You drank her to death."

"You little bitch," she growls, lunging for me. I escape her grasp and sprint up the stairs. She follows but she's drunk so she's slower. 

My heart is racing and I feel like I'm running for my life, fear of getting caught pulsating through me. Every step of her heavy footsteps sends another jolt of fear through my chest, threatening to eat me alive. 

I race through my room and to Austin's bathroom door and pound on it, "Austin, it's me hon. Let me in please."

I hear the chair being moved and I unlock the door, closing it hurriedly behind me. I have no way of locking it from the outside but I shove the chair under the doorknob again so it can't be opened. 

My mother pounds her fists against the door, making us both jump back in fright. She starts yelling ugly things as my brother and I. We sink to the ground in the corner and I place my hands tightly over his ear so he can't hear. 

He can probably still hear the shouts, but not the distinct words. He curls into my chest and puts his small hands on top of mine to drown out the words being thrown at him. 

I can still hear everything though. Every wicked word. It's horrible. It's so much worse than physical abuse. At least when she hits me or pushes me, the bruises heal and fade. 

But with mental abuse, these vile words will never stop ringing in my ears, never stop plaguing my nightmares. They'll never go away. 

Tears run down my cheeks and I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to tune out the world around me. It doesn't work. I can still hear her calling me a bitch. I can hear her calling Austin a killer. I can hear her telling us to kill ourselves like Dad did so she didn't have to deal with feeding us anymore. 

It hurts my chest to hear her talking like that. It brings back painful memories about Dad and how I found him. It's poison, running through my ears and through my entire body, making me shake violently. 

I sob loudly, focusing on Austin against me, his warm, small frame, snuggled in my arms. This is why I'm still here, I have to remind myself. He needs me. That's why I'm still alive. 

***

This was really hard for me to write but I feel like it was needed to give more insight into what she goes through and into her past more. Lemme know that you think