Shut Up And Kiss Me (gxg)

34. Holy F*cker

      MY CHEST CAUGHT. MY breaths came out in short, uneven little pants, and I almost moved towards her—almost answered that unspoken question.

     Yes, I thought. You're worth it. You're worth the risk.

      I said, "When you asked me, a while ago, why I hated you, I said I didn't. And . . . I don't. And I know I let you walk away, and I know you probably want nothing to do with me, but I—I want to be friends. If you want that, too."

      "Friends," she murmured.

      "Just friends. And . . . no more being assholes to each other. And no more arguing or—"

       "I like arguing with you."

       I blushed. "No more . . . no more hatred and avoiding and . . . secrets. I'll be honest with you if you're honest with me."

        Monroe's eyes darkened. "Talia, that's a promise you're not willing to uphold, so don't bother making it."

        Honesty. Maybe she was right. Maybe I hadn't been entirely honest with her—or anyone.

        Especially myself.

        "Okay," I agreed. Because I still couldn't be honest with her. Not yet. "But we'll be—friends. We'll do things friends do."

        "What do friends do?"

        Kiss. "Um. They drink hot chocolate and walk around and"—I thought of Olivia—"they do face masks and bathbombs together."

        "Okay," she said.

        "Okay?"

        "Okay." Her grin was sharp, but her lips looked so soft. "We'll be friends."

        "Friends," I repeated, and I couldn't help it—I smiled too.

        "Kingston!" barked the shrill voice of Mrs. O'Hara. "Decker! Get back to your respective rooms!"

        I backed away from Monroe, but my eyes held hers. And as I ducked down the hallway and started running, I couldn't stop thinking of it: Friends.

        I'd never thought that word would feel like a glow, blooming in my chest, all the way to my fingertips. But God fucking help me, it did.

       ON OUR SECOND DAY AT THE resort, I found myself with Skylar at a spa.

       "I never asked," I said, "but how on earth is Lila Bard here?  Like, here here? She's not even a student anymore."

       "Oh, I booked her a room," Skylar told me breezily. "She's not in the school area, but that just made our midnight rendezvous all the more exciting."

        A midnight rendezvous?

       "Your life sounds like a movie," I said. "Fuck. Maybe you're the main character."

       She only laughed. Our feet were both soaked in warm, foaming water, and we had already chosen nail polish colours: red for Skylar and pale pink for me. The spa had actually been a great idea. Not that I would ever tell her that.

        "So," I said, humming a bit. "What do you think of . . . ah . . ." I felt so relaxed now that the words slipped away.

        "Have you seen Claudia?" Skylar asked. "I think she has a girlfriend."