~Momojiro one shots~

Random shit cause why not

This is just gonna be random stuff based off of things i read and felt like this would be them

————————————————————————————
All the girls were training and Momo was teaching Uraraka and Jiro something when she came up with something

Momo: For self defence reasons, I'm going to pretend to be a burglar and you guys have to act wisely
Uraraka: Okay
Jiro: Sure
Momo: If you want to live give me all your money
Uraraka whilst crossing her arms smirking: Bold of you to assume i have money
Jiro resting her arm on Urarakas shoulder smirking: Bold of you to assume i want to live
Momo:
Mina, Toru and Tsu start laughing whilst falling to the floor and eventually Momo starts laughing slightly
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Momo: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life
Uraraka: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back...
Tsu: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this
Jiro: My will to live! I haven't seen this in 15 years
Toru: I knew i lost that potential somewhere
Mina: Mental stability, my old friend!
Momo: Jesus, could you lighten up a little?
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Toru: Any extreme sports you've tried?
Mina: Doing my homework while Aizawa-Sensei is collecting it
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Jiro: Has anyone seen my top?
Mina: Yea Momos in the kitchen
Uraraka chokes
Tsu spits out her drink
Jiro with a slightly blushing face: M-MINA!
Momo from the kitchen: Were switches actually!
Jiro blushing loads: MOMO!
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Mina: Hit or miss-
Jiro: Depression is a bitch, huh?
Momo: You got anxiety i bet it never leaves ya-
Iida walking past before stopping after Momo adds on: EVEN MOMO JOINED THAT?!
~~~~~Next one~~~~
Monoma: Well, well, well, if it isn't class 1-A
Jiro fully trying to mess with him: It is
Monoma:...
Mina joining in: It is class 1-A
Monoma: It's an expression
Momo finishing it off: It's not an expression it's class 1-A
Monoma:...
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Mr Aizawa: This body swap should only last 24 hours
Momo in Jiros body: I'm freaking out
Jiro in Momos body: What, why?!
Momo: HOW DO YOU LIVE WHILST BEING THIS SHORT?!
Jiro stares at her before starting to walk away
Momo: Wait babe-
Toru in Minas body: Wait i can't see myself now, i really am fully invisible huh
Aizawa: What?
Mina in Torus body: THIS ENTIRE TIME YOU COULD SEE YOURSELF?!
Toru: Yup
Mina: QUICK SOMEONE GIVE ME A MIRROR OR SOMETHING
Toru passes her one
Mina: I KNEW IT, YOU DO LOOK ADORABLE! I WAS RIGHT WHEN I SAID YOU LOOKED ADORABLE
Tsu in Urarakas body: Babe hElp
Uraraka in Tsus body: Press all five fingers together and say release
Tsu: Release!
Uraraka watches as she falls to the ground face plating before getting back up, she looks over to see Mina and Toru talking whilst Mina is holding a mirror and she sees Jiro and Momo talking as Momo keeps apologising
Jiro: It's fine Momo i was gonna make a comment about being tall anyway
Momo: Still i'm sorry
Jiro: It's fine babe-
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Momo: I'm the most responsible of the group
Tsu: You literally just set the kitchen on fire-
Momo: Yea and i take responsibility for that
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Uraraka: All in all this has been a 100% successful field trip!
Deku: You guys sent Mineta soaring into the sun
Mina: All in all this was a 100% successful field trip
Sero: You guys probably killed him-
Momo: All in all this was a 100% successful field trip
Todoroki: Did you guys plan this
Jiro: ALL IN ALL-
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Jiro: I want to be like a caterpillar
Tsu: Explain?
Jiro: Eat a lot, sleep for a while, wake up beautiful
Momo: You do know they have a life span of about a week, right?
Jiro: That's another highlight
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Mina very sleep deprived: Fill your body with cranberries so the horse that kills you gets a sensual surprise when he begins to feed
Momo: I will give the horse that kills me no such luxury
Uraraka: It's okay, we can add the cranberries later
Jiro:...What
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Mina getting annoyed: Why cant trees give off something useful and not just sit there doing nothing
Jiro without missing a beat: So just fuck oxygen right
Mina: Oh yea-
Momo: What do you mean Oh YeAh
Jiro without looking up from her phone: It means she's a daft ass
Mina: He-
Toru: Fair, love u babe
Mina: 🖕 to everyone except Toru. Toru gets the 😞
Toru: I have been shot with the guilt, i apologise for my sins
Tsu: What the fuck was all of that-
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Jiro sneezes into her arm
Mina: Oh, Jiros dabbing
Jiro: I'm not i have fucking allergies-
Mina: Watch she's gonna do it again
Jiro sneezes into her arm
Momo and Mina trying to mess with her: Hit it Jiro hit it-
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Aizawa: Nothing is free
Mina: Love is free
Uraraka: Friendship is free
Tsu: Sleep is free
Momo: Knowledge is free
Toru: Air is free
Jiro: Everything is free if you take it without asking
Momo: Babe no-
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Jiro locked herself in her room and the whole class had been trying to get in to help her when Momo finally gets back
Mina: MOMO HELP JIRO HAS LOCKED HERSELF IN HER ROOM
Momo: WHY DIDNT YOU CALL ME
Bakugo: JUST HURRY UP MOMO
Momo: DONT WORRY, LOCKS ARE MY SPECIALITY
Everyone thinking she'll use her key or make one
Momo breaks down the door to see Jiro curled up in her bed
Iida: MOMO YOU CANT BREAK SCHOOL PROPERTY, NOW YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR THAT-
Iida gets cut off by momo throwing loads of money at his face and running over to Jiro to comfort her. The rest of the class still there start laughing
Uraraka whispering: Why can't someone throw money at my face
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Momo: I hate you Mineta
Mineta: No you don't everyone loves me!
Mina: Who's gonna tell him
Kyo: I WILL WE ALL FUCKING HATE YOU BITCH
Momo: Kyo calm down-
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Kyo and Kami in the middle of no where after going out when it's dark
Kyo: Now who do we call to help us because neither of our partners are gonna be happy
Kami: Momo she won't physically hurt us in any way
Kyo: First of all she would by smacking my head second what-
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Kyo was up late playing video games and Momo wanted them to get off it
Momo: Please? For me?
Kyo: Stop that
Momo: Stop what?
Kyo: Stop thinking every time you say "Please? For me?" That i'll do anything you want. Not this time missy.
Momo: ...Please? For me?
Kyo: ...Ok
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Momosquad
Pink bubblegum hoe: So what happened?

God as a bitch: We we're in the car and Kyo had the audacity to play Little Miss Perfect

Gods bitch: I'm sorry-
~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Momo: One day, i hope the universe sees you the way i see you.
Kyo: Awww that's really sweet Mo-
Momo: Short.
Kyo: ...
Momo starts backing away slowly
Kyo: And fast. You forgot fast.
They ran and jumped on Momo.
~~~~~~Next one~~~~~
Momo: Your smile? It makes my dad
Kyo: Your happiness? I live for that
Hagakure: A room? Get one
Mina: Hotel? Trivago