I think I love you

The next day

Rylands POV
I didn't sleep last night, cause she's not here.
That's how it was when we were broken up.
I hear someone knocking on the door, "ayo Ryland open up! It's me, chase and Nick" Barron says, "it's unlocked!" I say, they walk in.
"Thomas told us what happened" nick says to me, and hugs me, "how are you feeling?" Chase asks, "well besides the fact of my girlfriend killing herself I'm just great" I say, rolling my eyes. "It's crazy she's gone I miss her" nick says.

I always loved her and nick's friendship. He always cared for her, even when me and Lessie didn't really know eachother, he was there for her.

"Me and Mia have to talk about the funeral today" I say, "she's really gone" I say, reprocessing what I just said. "Do you think you're gonna announce it?" Barron asks, "I will have to fans and everyone is gonna wonder where the hell she is" I answer, "but probably not her note, I post a YouTube video so am I able to sit down and explain it" "but besides that we brought some of your clothes knowing that you aren't leaving here anytime soon" chase says giving me a dufflebag. "But we'll go now to give you some space" he says, "I'll stay" Nick says.

Him and Barron leave.

"I'm not sure if I should do the video now or?-" "you should do it now" he says to me, "people are gonna start to worry soon so I would tell them now" "okay, I'm gonna look for her camera cause I don't have mine" I get up from the couch, and go in the bedroom.

I haven't been in there in a little while, and by the looks of it she obviously wasn't in the right mental state. The room smells like her.

I look on the desk for the camera, and I find it.
I check and it's half battery, it should work.
"I got it" I say.

•
"Hey guys, so I wanted to talk about something that happened and was and still is very painful, I wanna give a trigger warning before you watch this" I say, "this gonna be hard to explain without crying, um you guys know that me and Alessia have broken up, but the reason why it wasn't brought into the light was because I did cheat on her, she saw a video of me kissing someone else" I say, "We had been broken us for a few weeks, but yesterday " I look at my phone for the date. "May 29th 2021, Alessia had texted me to come over so we could talk, I will put the messages right here" I say pointing somewhere.

"God bro this so hard" I say to nick, "keep going" he says, giving me a thumbs up.

"So when me and Alessia broke up I moved out, but she told me to come over so we could talk, so I drove to her house and we talked, we decided to put the whole situation behind us, let me let you know that Alessia hasn't been in the right head space lately and us breaking up wasn't the best point either, so we put it behind us and we're just laying on the couch, but an alarm goes off on her phone, she tells me that she'll be right back, and kisses me" a few tears start to fall down of my face. "Um she was gone for a little while, so I went to check on her and she was there in the bathroom dead" I say.

"Shit" I say, and bury my head in my knees. "Alessia committed suicide last night" I say, "when this video releases it will be her funeral day, Lessie swallowed pills, she did leave a note but I will not be releasing that to the world, cause I wanna respect her privacy" I say, "I love her so much, and it's just hard to see the love of my life gone" I say, wiping tears. "Alessia was only my girlfriend for three months but I really loved that girl" I say, "but it's gonna be hard for me to let her go, I think I might take a break for a little, in her note she did say that it's not my fault but I'm not gonna be able to believe that" I say, "But I love Alessia Fallon so much, and may my shawty rest easy maybe I'll be apart of 27 club for her" I say finishing the video.
•
"You did good" nick says dapping me, "small steps" he says.