Pins and Needles

Chapter 13

I dragged the red marker over the thin paper, marking out the third Thursday in November. Thanksgiving was right around the corner and luckily enough for me, that meant today was the last day of school until break. That also meant I only had one more day to worry about Dean and everything else before total relaxation. The nerves were getting to me, so all I wanted was for this week to be done and over with. I needed a new start after Thanksgiving, that's it.

I placed down the red marker and turned to face the mirror. I knew I hadn't talked to the girl in a while; I hadn't had the time or energy to. I just hoped she wouldn't be mad at me, after all, I had something I desperately wanted to ask her.

"Uhm, hey. How are you?" I asked as I inched closer to the frame.

The girl stared at me, seemingly unamused by my question.

"Ah, yeah I know I haven't seen you for a while, only brief check-ins, but I really have been busy! So much has happened and I would love to tell you, but I seriously need to ask you something. I can't ask my friends because they'll just lie and I can't ask my mom because she'll just tell me what I want to hear. It has to be you, I trust you," I explained.

The girl still refrained from speaking, but her face showed that she was undeniably concerned, so I took that as an ok.

"So, this has actually been a huge question of mine for a while now, but it was only rekindled when I got into a bit of an altercation with Clark. Yeah, that guy," I said, watching as her face turned from concern to repulsion. "Anyways, what I'm trying to say is... uh... do you think I'm... ugly?" I choked out the last word and positioned the pin to my finger in anticipation of the girl's response.

She watched me for a while. I couldn't read her eyes; her expression was obstructed by the light and the way her head faced. I looked up to try and get a better view, but right as I did so, she copied me. Her eyes shone with desperation and her mouth hung open while her bottom lip quivered. I couldn't understand why she looked so anguished; was I really that ugly? Before my self-esteem could plummet any further, I heard a soft whisper.

"No."

My head shot up and we both held each other's gaze for a moment. She seemed bewildered by her own answer, but I was so focused on her response that I hardly noticed. I took a shaky step forward the same time she did and simply asked, "Can you describe to me what I look like?"

I was beginning to sweat, so eager for an explanation that I couldn't help but press the pin straight into my finger. We walked closer to one another, each taking a step as the other did. I raised my hand, the clear shudder in it's holding ever visible as I continued to lift it. The girl seemed to read my mind and began doing the same. My hand was dangerously close to hers, about an eraser head's length apart. All we had to do was extend the pointer finger just a bit and...

"Angelica! You're going to be late!"

I leapt away from the mirror, my breath catching in my throat. I panted away the air I was unconsciously holding in my lungs and gaped at the girl one last time. She looked frightened, puzzled, and even disappointed. My eyes grew large and I curled up my eyebrows before murmuring an apology to her. I didn't even know what I was sorry for, but I couldn't help feeling like I had crossed a line. I scrambled to pack my stuff up and practically sprinted out the door to escape the suffocating atmosphere.

...

School was the last thing on my mind, but I knew that had to change if I wanted to get to the weekend smoothly. Sadly, that objective didn't last long as I ran into an obstacle not even 5 minutes after arriving. Dean was propped snuggly against the wall of the hall I had turned down, chatting it up with Jess and Simon. I changed directions instantly, almost as if avoiding Dean had become second nature. I decided to take the longer way to get to math; it was less efficient, but I had time to spare, so no harm no foul.