Rattlebones (bxbxb)

Clucky's Chicken Hell

I sleep in the darkness. 

I awaken. 

And when I open my eyes, I'm seated in a booth in some type of restaurant. The smell of fried chicken permeates the air, and there's an ambiance of absurdity to the nauseating yellow and red decor. 

Clucky's Fried Chicken, the posters and banners declare around me along with a dancing chicken who's on fire. It didn't seem familiar, but for some reason, I felt as if I had been here before. Maybe in some obscure childhood memory that I had suppressed among many others. 

I sit up and I look around. There's a grinning cashier behind the counter who's staring into space, waiting for customers who never come. The kitchen is dark, but for some reason, there are flames coming from somewhere deep in the back, as if someone had lit a bonfire. 

The only other customer is a skeleton sitting in a booth nearby.

My stomach immediately drops because I recognize his hair, baggy clothes, and amazing jawline that could cut through glass. All that remained of Eugene Wilder, the rest of him, gone.

"Eugene!?" I shout and I run towards him.

"Eugene...no...please!" I grab hold of his shoulder and his body slumps over when I touch him, his jaw cracking open with an eerie squeal. There were no possible signs of life, not a heart or a quick-witted remark. My lover had been roasted like a pig over a pyre, by my own hands. 

I fling an arm over my eyes and then lean against the table, shuddering sobs escaping my body. I assumed that if this was Hell, then my punishment was having to face the fact that I'd just killed my two partners and destroyed a teenager's birthday party.

"Welcome to Hell, Darcy Brown!" A cheerful voice erupts from the kitchen, and a thin, pale man comes waltzing out of the kitchen carrying a large tray of chicken fried goodness. 

I sit up immediately and wipe my eyes, focusing on the only sign of life in the dining room with me. The man was wearing a yellow uniform, including a cap with a fake roosters comb protruding from the top and a name tag that said, "Nigel." In cheerful letters.

"Hell?" I manage to sniffle. "Why am I in Hell? I didn't do anything wrong!" I protest. "Aside from setting fire to Rainbow Lewis's room and destroying any chance that Eugene and Iggy had of living a normal life, I mean."

"Oh, sweetheart," Nigel sighs and takes a seat across from me and Eugene, who's still very much dead. "Don't you know? You destroyed half your city and killed countless people! It was a complete massacre!" He reaches down and he grabs a chicken leg. "We've never seen anything like it before."

"We?" I question, sounding a bit cautious. "Who is We, and why am I here?" 

Nigel takes a bite of his chicken and the crunch is just awful. He slurps and smacks, and grease gets all over his face. But as he's shoveling chicken into his mouth, I notice that his teeth are surprisingly pointy. "You've been here before." He replies finally, and then he wipes his mouth off with a napkin. "You're the son of Death, so naturally this was supposed to be your home." 

I'm completely speechless at this point.

"Unfortunately, you tried to oust Satan and attempted to rule Hell several times." Nigel continues. "So the Demon Council decided to pretend to make up some mission and they lied to you and sent you to Earth. We didn't know what else to do with you. You were like a miniature tyrant, and you fought everybody. Good times, good times, am I right?" 

I don't know whether to be shocked or offended, so I settle on both. "You sent a demon to Earth in the body of a child?" I repeat. 

Nigel grabs his drink and he takes a long gulp through a bendy straw. "Oh, don't act so shocked. We sent one of Life's children to accompany you on your journey. Your powers work in sync-- life, and death, hand in hand. Pretty nifty, right? What we weren't counting on was the dead boy entering the picture or the threesome. You can't plan this shit!"

My world narrows down to nothing. Everything that I had been, and everything that I knew just implodes inside my head, and suddenly I don't know who I am anymore. I look over at Eugene, who had once been vibrant and full of life, and then I look back at Nigel, who's dipping a fry in ketchup. "It's too bad you killed him. He was a good kid." He murmurs.

I lose control in that instant. The very idea of not only my life but my friend's life being dominated by some chicken-eating fool? I couldn't take it.

I grab the end of Nigel's tray in an instant and I fling it as hard as I can, chicken flying, crashing into the opposite wall and booths. "Iggy and Eugene have nothing to do with this!" I shout at him. "They deserve to have their lives back! They have a future, even if I don't!"

Nigel leans back when his chicken scatters, his lips pursing a bit. "Then are you willing to bargain?" He questions and the cheerfulness to his tone slips away.

I slowly sit back down.

I was willing to risk anything to bring Iggy and Eugene back. Even my own freedom. I think of Iggy touching my hair, kissing me, and whispering reassuring words. Of Eugene Wilder giving me advice and picking me up when I was down. I had put them through hell, and yet they had never left my side. 

"What do you want?" I murmur. "I'll do anything to bring them back. Anything."

And Nigel smiles in response.