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♥︎
The following nearly two months had gone by smoothly, and Wanda and Natalia's sessions had been more frequent, even speaking to one another on the phone for a span of 20 minutes to an hour. Both of their phone bills had increased tremendously.
Other than that, Wanda was feeling more comfortable with each passing day talking to Natalia, it was like, she was being pulled into an euphoric ocean of relief. She didn't seem to care for how much she was sharing, Wanda felt safe whenever she was with Natalia. On another positive note, Wanda felt like she was getting better.
On the other hand, Natalia had never gotten to asking Wanda about the things she'd discovered. Every time Natalia considered bringing it up she decided against it, not wanting to pop Wanda's bubble, changing the subject instead.
Yet, it had been nearly two months, if not now, then when?
"Wanda.." Natalia began, removing the phone from her ear and putting it on speaker, "There's something I'd like to talk to you about,"
"Go ahead," Wanda permitted.
"How do you feel about Vision?" Natalia questioned, subtly hesitant.
She could practically feel Wanda's engaging head tilt from the phone, "Uh.. what do you mean?"
Natalia was grateful Wanda wasn't angry, well maybe she was, Natalia couldn't really tell.
"Are you still, in.." She paused, "love, with him?" She let out, chewing on the inside of her cheek.
Wanda was silent, she was tentative on answering such a question, it felt too personal. Yet, Natalia knew nearly everything about her, so she knew she could. Problem was, she didn't even know how.
"I.." Wanda paused, her mouth agape as she felt her mouth go dry, sustaining there wasn't a distinct answer that came to her mind, "I don't even know.."
"Are you sure?" Natalia asked,not wanting to be skeptical, but she knew Wanda was capable of lying.
"It's like," Wanda could tell that distress was filling the aura of the conversation, "I miss him, but.. not like I used to. I don't know if it's about that, thing I had," Natalia could understand what she was referring to, "But, I can feel it, it's like his spot in my heart is being, changed.." Wanda confessed, not even understanding her words. It felt foreign to even hear herself say it, because she never even thought of it this way before. Despite that, she felt it made sense, but also off at the same time.
Natalia herself did not expect for such feel and bold expression to be heard from the phone, but she wasn't disappointed. She knew Wanda was getting there, Wanda's peacd was so close, as if she could reach out and touch it.
"Are you sad that you feel like that?" Natalia nearly smiled, feeling so much pride in the other woman, it was uplifting.
"No.." Wanda sighed, relief and realization evident in the way she whispered her single word.
Natalia nodded, freely smiling to herself as she commented, "Do you feel better after telling me that?"
"I assume so," Wanda answers, "It's still, blurry around the lines, but.. I don't feel worse, if that says anything," Wanda lightly reveals, swaying her body as she talked.
"That does say something, thank you," Natalia chuckled, "I'm going to have to let you go now, but i'll just tell you, you're gonna be good, I believe in you, goodnight!" Natalia farewells, Wanda returning the goodbye and hanging up.
Wanda took a huge breath of relief as she threw herself onto the bed, dazedly focusing her eyes at the ceiling light.
She remembered the conversation that took place today, well it only ended a few seconds ago, of course she'd remember it- but she focused on her own confession, and began to attempt at deciphering the missing parts of it.
Wanda had to admit, she felt reassured with herself after avowing her own subconscious thoughts, yet some of it felt like a lie.
Vision was, without question, a huge part of her life, she languished to be able to converse and spend time with him once again.
Yet that was the problem, she wanted to do the same with others, such as her friends, which..confused her.
Vision had been her romantic partner, the ideal would be more affectionate but right now it only felt cordial.
Her heart still had room to love another, but it wasn't Vision, she knew that now, or had some kind of idea around that sentiment. Yet, she wondered as to why the deem in her heart felt as if it was being replaced more than actually discarded.
Wanda didn't know what to think of it, yes, she was thrilled that her own mind wasn't all too smitten with Vision anymore, she felt elated that she was beginning to retreat pain in the past.
On the other hand, she was discomforted, she didn't even know what was happening, or why. Replacement for such an emotion was such a tremendous change, Wanda didn't know if she was ready for that. In addition, Wanda wasn't aware which individual had taken place in her amortization.
Wanda considered not telling Natalia about it, but she knew it would be beneficial to. They could even talk on it, and by the end, Wanda could feel better about it.
thank you for reading, i have mixed feelings on this chapter but nonetheless i'm actually proud of it :)
