Why Can't you see Me

Part 4

The image that greeted him in the mirror was perfect. He promised himself he wouldn't look until his shirt was fully buttoned up, and, wow, was it worth it.
Running his hands down his torso, it felt so flat. Looking in the mirror, with a fresh haircut and clean clothes, it looked so...him.
That was him. Varian. He, him, a boy- no. A man.

The tears sprouted, and he wrapped himself up in a hug, dropping to the floor, ecstasy flowing through him. A year of sitting in that cell, of puberty ruining his self image as they grew, of feeling them every time he moved, even when he barely did, he still noticed, and now they were practically gone. He couldn't believe it.

"Hey, Varian-... What's going on? You better not be going soft on us." Andrew stood in the doorway, he hadn't heard it being opened. Andrew didn't know, none of them did. It would stay that way.
"Uh, no no, sorry, I just... it's been so long since I've seen myself in the mirror, I'm so happy to be free again, that's all. Sorry." Wasn't really a lie.
"Right, right. Well, 10 minutes, then we have a meeting in the castle. We got word that the princess is coming home today." Andrew slapped a hand against his shoulder and left Varian tense and panicked. She could ruin all this for him. Hopefully, she's forgotten.

"Welcome back Rapunzel." He walked out of the smoky shadows, so gleeful at her shock. Good. Let her come back to a ruined kingdom.
"Varian?! Why are you working with these guys? You know what they did!"
"And they know what I did! We're all in the same boat, all tossed aside, all ignored and forgotten! All pissed off...at you."
Her hand flew to her mouth, Eugene's hands tightened on her shoulders. Her gaze angrily turned to Andrew.

"What did you do? What did you say to her?!"
Her. No god please no. Please let that be a mistake.
"I..." Andrew's look at him was piercing his skull, "...did nothing. I was simply a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen. He did the rest himself."
"I don't believe you! Varian can't have done all this," Rapunzel gestures around the castle, "by herself! She's just a kid!"
Herself. She's. Rapunzel didn't forget, of course she didn't.
"Okay, hold on. Before we continue this argument, Varian," the man walked a precise few steps towards him. "Why does she keep saying that? She? Her?"
"I-I-I don't know. Maybe trauma deranged her?"
"Hehe, don't play dumb with me sweetheart. What's she on about?"
"I-I-I-I- I don't know! Honestly!" He tripped over some rubble behind him as Andrew stepped yet closer.
"Varian. Have you been hiding something from us?"
Varian stayed quiet.
"She's a girl. Didn't she tell you?" Rapunzel filled the silence. Varian wanted to scream at her, lunge and tear and claw at her, but one wrong move could have a dozen swords at his throat.

"What?! No, he's a boy. Varian, the boy genius who nearly killed the royals."
"Varian the girl genius."
Girl. She. He. Boy. God he was getting lost in his own head, it was too loud.
"Varian!"
He snapped back to focus, Andrew called his name.
"Are you a boy, or a girl?"
He wasn't sure how to answer.
"WELL?! WHAT ARE YOU?!" His shout made Varian flinch back.
"I...don't know, anymore." He hung his head, the thoughts in it getting more and more fuddled.

"Heh. Wow. Can't believe you lied to us V, that's impressive, lying to the ones who could kill you at one wrong turn." He pulled his sword from where Varian hadn't even noticed it at his throat, and twirled it gracefully. "You know, we have thief's, and smugglers, and hagglers among us, and we don't mind one bit. But..." he walked even closer to Varian, pulled at his ear so that they were face to face. "We have no room for freaks."

"If you don't mind, we're going to be leaving now, and even if you do, make a step and the circus toy gets it." He nudged the tip of his sword at Varian, who was now crying. Slowly, the band of loose crooks backed out of the room, and down the hall, out the castle. For now.

"Varian, are you oka-"
"Shut up." He said plainly from the floor, his voice was surprisingly calm.
"Hey, now no need to be like that Hairstripe."
"She could have stayed quiet. They accepted me, and you FUCKED it! So thanks for that."
"Varian-"
"Shut. Up."
"I just want to say...I know how to free your father..."

His world stopped. His father, free again? The miracle. He slowly raised his head, staring into the eyes of the Princess.
"You better not be lying."