Promise? [{CLEXA AU}]

Chapter Twenty-Five: Sorry

"Raven if you don't shut up I'll ban you from polis." Lexa was sick of ravens questioning.

"You would never." Raven challenged.

"Watch me." Lexa challenged back. Raven immediately backed down.

"Why don't we let them be," Octavia grabbed a hold of ravens hand a dragged her towards the door of the apartment. Raven fought back, but in the end gave in to Octavias plan. "We will be at grounders." Octavia shouted as the door shut behind them.

"Well...." they both said at the same time. The both chuckled, managing to ease the awkwardness slightly.

"Before we do anything, there's one thing I got to tell you." Lexa stated, Clarke's eyes searched hers, looking for a sign of what she was about to say. "I have the weekend, we can pretend to be whatever, be friends, be something.... but after that I can't give you anymore." Clarke nodded, her eyes now looking at her feet. She couldn't think of anything to say.

"As much as I'd love to continue to get to know you, I can't. I can't let you get hurt, it's alrighty risking so much being with you here. Especially after last night." Clarke was still looking at her feet. Lexa noticed She was still in pajamas. Clarke raised her head, their eyes meeting once again.

"Lexa, I can handle myself. I spent so much time lying to myself, racking through everything in my brain, I still don't exactly know what it is still or what the future will be, but..." Clarke hesitated slightly. "But I want you in it. After last night I feel connected to you, and don't lie to me, I know you do too. Don't push me away, I can handle doing whatever during school, I get it. But when we're free I want to be around you, I don't care if it's friends, I just want the real you."

"Clarke, I can't do that."

"Why not?!" Clarke demanded an answer.

"I told you, your going to get hurt. And I can't let that happen!" Lexa replied.

"And I said I can't handle myself!" Clarke almost gridded through her teeth.

"You don't understand." Lexa sighed.

"Then help me understand!"

"I can't do that." Lexa said once again. "Let's just enjoy this for today." She gestured between the two. "We will figure the rest out tomorrow." Clarke nodded.

Lexa pulled Clarke close and wrapped her arms around her. She a wetness on her neck, Clarke was crying.

It had all been to much on Clarke, maybe this happened to fast, maybe it was Lexa taking away any hope, maybe it was just everything all at once. Lexa didn't pull back, but pulled Clarke in closer, holding her tight.

***

After that was out of the way, Clarke and Lexa took a seat of the couch. Clarke put on, Aladdin and laid her head in Lexa's lap. She felt Lexa fingers find her hair, they racked through it as the movie began.

     Half way through the movie she heard a light snore coming for Clarke. She was asleep, Lexa could see her face but she guessed it looked peaceful, perhaps the only time she gets any peace.

     Before Lexa had shown up at sanctum she had heard Anya say something about a new girl joining the class. She learned her name was Clarke and her mother was in jail. And that was about it until Luna mentioned Clarke was 'a daughter of an alcoholic.' After that she didn't know much more, though she had theories, abuse, neglect, drugs, she hopped none of them where true for Clarke's sake.

     But Lexa knew one things for sure, she couldn't let her get hurt anymore. She slowly lifted Clarke's head, sliding out from under her and placing a pillow in her place. "I'm sorry Clarke," she whispered. Lexa bent down placing a lingering kiss on Clarke's forehead. "So so sorry." And she walked out of the apartment, carefully shutting the door behind her.
  
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I'm so sorry guys. But I had an idea that will make you hate me even more. But just know I love you.