Fateful Fantasy

9 Explanations

After the long drive I was totally worn out. Despite the many breaks I had taken, this trip home had been very exhausting for me. I unlocked the door and looked around my home. It looked the same as it always did. More or less. 

I was really thankful for my friend Carmen, who had come by here regularly during my absence and looked after things. She was a true angel and I took it upon myself to give her a big gift basket with lots of delicious goodies and a gift card for a massage.

I sat down on the sofa and put my legs up. God, that felt so good. I pulled a blanket over me and immediately my body relaxed. It was hard for me not to fall asleep. The urge to just close my eyes and sleep was strong, but I had to talk to Kyle and Adam first.

When there was finally a knock at the door, I was much too tired and lazy to get up. I simply called them to me.

"Come in!" I called, hoping it was loud enough for them to hear. Then I heard the door open and Kyle cautiously peeked around the corner. When his eyes fell on me, his whole face brightened up.

Adam followed at his heels, a smile showing on his face as well. Seeing the two of them again was really great and I had missed them so much. Maybe more than I realized.

"Hey. It's so good to finally see you again." said Kyle as he leaned down to give me a hug.

"It's good to see you too," I replied as he let go of me so Adam could have a chance to greet me properly.

"You look so tired. Are you sure you want to talk to us today? We can put it off until tomorrow. Unless you want to disappear again," Adam said. He didn't let on, but I could feel how hurt he was. And the expression on Kyle's face after Adam's statement clearly showed that he felt the same way.

"I'm fine, really. It's just been a long day. But I owe you an explanation and there's no way this can wait any longer. Sit down, please," I replied.

Kyle and Adam both sat down and looked at me expectantly. They waited patiently until I had sorted out my thoughts and started to talk.

"Alright, as you know I had been diagnosed with the heart valve defect three months ago and had surgery as a result. But when I was examined before the operation, the doctors found out that I am... that I am, well, that I am pregnant," I began to tell them.

However, the reaction of the guys was different than I had expected. I had thought they would immediately start screaming or run out of the house. Instead, they just sat there and stared at me. I tried to interpret their facial expressions, but they were just... blank.

"I know I should have told you, but.... I just couldn't. I guess I wanted... Oh hell, I don't even know what was going through my head. First the doctors tried to convince me to end the pregnancy. Because of the long, difficult surgery. And the use of the heart-lung machine, they were of the opinion that I would suffer a miscarriage anyway. They thought it would be too much stress for the fetus.

But I didn't. They operated on me and everything was fine. But now there was the problem with all the different medications I was getting. Painkillers, antibiotics and so many other things. I was checked regularly and everything is fine, but neither I nor the doctors have any idea what impact this whole situation will have on the development of the babies." I explained further.

"Woah, did you just say 'babies'? As in several?" asked Adam suddenly. Still I couldn't interpret his expression.

"Yeah, I did. I'm going to have twins. A boy and a girl to be exact." I said softly and my eyes wandered like my hand to my belly which was still hidden under the blanket.

"Oh my god..." whispered Kyle, putting his face in his hands.

"And I want to apologize to you guys. I know I'm a terrible person for not telling you. I just didn't know how. I mean, the chance that I could lose them was so high. And then the fact that this situation with the three of us was never more than for fun. Plus, I have no idea which one of you is the father of the babies. It's a whole lot, I know that. But let me assure you that I don't expect anything from you. Not from any of you. You can be as involved as you want to be. Or you don't have to be involved at all. I will not pressure you, Adam, or you, Kyle, in any way." I explained to them.

"How far along are you right now, Y/N?" asked Kyle all of a sudden as he lifted his head and looked at me.

"I'm 20 weeks pregnant. I've been able to feel them move for about a week now," I replied.

"Y/N, get up!" demanded Adam. After a quick glance in his direction, I did as he said. 

I threw the blanket aside and carefully straightened up. I saw both men's eyes widen as their eyes fell on my baby bump.

"Can I... Can I touch?" asked Adam hesitantly.

"Of course. Come here." I said.

He stood up and very gently placed his hand on my belly. I moved his hand to the spot where I just felt slight movement.

"On this side is the boy. Can you feel that?" I wanted to know as I looked up at him.

"A little bit. Kyle come here." he then said. I looked to Kyle, he still looked a little stunned.

"Kyle? Are you okay?" l asked concerned.

"I'm not sure. It's a lot." he replied.

"I'm so sorry, Kyle. Please come here!" I pleaded with tears in my eyes.

Kyle hesitantly stood up and slowly walked towards us. Carefully, I reached for his hand and placed it on the other side of my bump.

"Right here is the girl." I explained.

"Wow...that's so weird." he whispered.

"Tell me about it!" I retorted to lighten the mood a bit.

I didn't have the slightest idea what would happen next, but whatever happened, I had to live with it.