𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 :𝟑

always here for you

relationship status : dating
y/n's pov
warnings: self harm! (please please don't read if this may make you feel upset in anyway!)
also slight blood mentions again please skip if you don't like this type of stuff!!

it's gotten to the point where i can't take it anymore. whenever i think about it my throat grows dry, my vision becomes blurry and my mind is a concoction of dark thoughts that i'm not sure even make sense to me anymore.

i shouldn't hurt myself, i know. but it's my only way to cope. of course i don't tell anyone, not even vinnie, he would break down if he knew.

the hardest part of the day is when vinnie goes home for the night, leaving my alone. the reoccurring intrusive thoughts pierce through to my brain, and the fake smile once situated onto my lips when i'm with vinnie, leaves.

the other hardest part is having to tug my sleeves down when vinnie's around, or having to hide my scars when we're intimate.

vinnie just left for today. i can't help the dark whispers already creeping into my mind.

before i know it i'm sat against the bathtub, tears spilling from my eyes and down my face as i hold the razor to my skin.

i don't even hear the click of a door before the familiar red liquid seeps through and it begins to slowly drip down my arm.

"baby i forgot my-" i try to cover my wrists with my hands but it's too late. vinnie has already seen my current state, and the heart-rending look on his face only clarifies that.

"i- i didn't know you would be back" i stutter, as vinnie falls to his knees next to me, quick to examine my arms.

a few scars are dotted here and there, nothing too graphic. but vinnie's expression makes it seem like i'm covered head to toe in wounds.

"i'm so sorry" i fiddle with my fingers in my lap, unsure of what else to say.

"i didn't know- i should've known. i could've helped you" vinnie's voice cracks as he holds my hands in his gently,

"don't blame this on yourself, it's not your fault" the words come out as a mere whisper.

"let me see?" he says as soft as ever, softer than i would've imagined. not that i have imagined my secret being revealed, but if i did i would think vinnie would be mad. he's got enough to worry about and i'm just adding to the problems.

he examines the cuts, i watch as his frown deepens as he lifts his gaze back up to look at me.

his hand meets my face as he cups it gently, swiping the fallen tears away just like i wish he could with my pain.

"how about we get you cleaned up, yeah?" i bite the inside of my cheek, simply nodding.

vinnie helps me over to the sink, grabbing cotton balls and different first aid materials before situating me on the toilet seat.

i watch as he gently dabs at the red lines, cleaning them up as carefully as possible and wiping away the excess blood.

"i'm no expert but this should be okay" a plaster is placed onto my wrist and i slightly giggle at vinnie's excessive actions to comfort me.

he glances up at me with a smile, a smile i didn't know that i needed.

vinnie rises back up to his usual height, before i do so too. he immediately wraps his arms around my body, hugging me tighter than i would've expected.

"thank you" i whisper into his skin, as he rubs small circles over my back.

"promise me you'll talk to someone about this. anyone."

"i will" i mumble, trying to swallow the lump in my throat away.

"i want you to promise me, y/n"

"i promise vin, i promise"

"you can go home now if you want" i pull away, blinking tears away at the thought of potentially being left alone again.

"i'm not leaving you y/n, i'll always be here for you"

"okay, thank you" i breathe out, sitting on the bed and picking at my nails once more.

vinnie leans back against the headboard, snaking an arm around my waist and pulling my body into his.

"i love you, so much. now let's try to get some sleep, okay? he places a loving kiss to my cheek, lips lingering there for a short moment.

"okay, and i love you too" i agree, my eyes slowly fluttering shut.

-
a/n!
just know if you may be experiencing anything like this, i'm always free to talk or even just listen:3