New Beginnings

No One Compares To You

Warnings: swearing

As Matt's car fades away down the street and comes out of view, I feel I can finally breathe. I close my eyes and take some deep breaths trying to understand what the fuck just happened. Matt just fucking kissed me. He wanted to get back together. He wanted me.

I can still feel his lips brushing mine. His hands holding mine. I'm so happy with Ally, I would never jeopardize that. But is it too late? Matt just kissed me! I may not have reciprocated the kiss but another pair of lips were on mine and I'm in a fucking commited relationship. I feel my phone vibrate from the back pocket of my jeans. I take it out and see Ally's name. I throw my phone across the room and it hits the opposite wall as I scream "FUCK."

My back is pressed on the front door, and I slide down to sit on the floor. I hold my face in my hands and sob.

I'm not sure how long I had been sitting. It could have been 10 minutes? Maybe a half hour? All I know is I've stopped crying and just in the same position, sniffling. I hear a knock on the door behind me, bringing me out of my thoughts. I stay crouched down on the floor so whoever it is can leave. They knock again...

I sigh and stand up. Before I open the door I look at the mirror on the wall and can see my smudged mascara under my eyes, my tousled hair and my wet cheeks. I tried to wipe some of the mascara however that attempt was pretty unsuccessful. I hear another knock. Ugh. I open the door despite my dishevelled appearance.

"O-oh Ally." My voice comes out slightly raspy however I try to smile to cover it. Ally's face drops. It's like I can see the wheels turning in her head as she looks me up and down. I realize she's taking in how horrible I look "hey Y/N, can I come in?" I nod, not entirely trusting my voice and move to the side to let her through.

Ally moves to the couch and I follow suit. "Um, did you want anything to drink?" Ally shakes her head and pats the spot on the couch beside her. I smile and have a seat, angling my body to face her to make it easy to see her. "I thought you worked today?" Ally shakes her head "I got off early. I actually wanted to surprise you." I smile "oh that's really sweet." Ally sighs "Y/N I saw a guy come to your house today."

My eyes widened slightly "oh. That was uh Matt." Ally nods "I thought he might be." I know I need to tell Ally what happened. I'm trying to take a moment to formulate the right words, I must have taken to long as Ally breaks me out of my thoughts "are you guys getting back together?" Ally says just above a whisper.

I look to her and see her eyes all glassy. It then clicks that Ally must have seen Matt kiss me. I can see how it would have been easy to mistake our kiss as something I reciprocated. Especially because Ally wouldn't have been able to hear me say no to him, considering I spoke softly and she would have been at her house watching from a distance.

"You saw the kiss?" Ally nods and a tear falls down her face "oh no, no no no." I say. I move closer to cup Ally's face and look directly into her eyes "Ally I love you. Not him. Not ever him. He kissed me and I pulled away and told him he needed to go." I wipe Ally's fresh tears. "B-but why was he in your house Y/N?" I sigh "I wanted to tell him about you. About us. Since the kids know I figured I should tell him before they do."

Ally sighs in relief "oh" she smiles and pecks me on the lips "Ally I will always love you. I will always choose you. Hell there wasn't even a choice to consider because no one compares to you. I've never felt a love so real." Ally smiles and holds the back of my neck, bringing me into her lips. I sigh against her soft, full lips.

Ally breaks the kiss, still holding me close but looks into my eyes, I didn't realize my tears left the threshold of my eyes until she says "why are you crying?" I sniffle and go to pull back but she holds me to be closer to her "I-I'm sorry I just missed your lips. I felt disgusting feeling his again." Ally nods and kisses my forehead. "How did it go telling him?" I sigh "really bad. He's always been kinda homophobic, even though he knew I was bi. He would either say he didn't believe me, or think I was out cheating on him with any girl I was ever friends with."

Ally frowns "wow, I'm sorry." I shake my head and close my eyes as a few more tears fall down my cheeks. Ally pulls me into her embrace, holding me securely and I rest my head on her shoulder, breathing in her familiar scent. My cries turn into full sobs and she rubs circles on my lower back.

"Shh it's alright. I'm here. Let it out." And I do. Embarrassingly so. "I-I'm sorry." Ally shakes her head "you have nothing to be sorry for." She kissed my head as I stayed hidden in her neck. My hands are gripping her shirt as I continue to cry.

After some time my cries soften, and I try to regulate my breathing. I sniffle a bit and then feel Ally move. I let out a whine "hey it's okay, I'm just going to lie down so I can properly hold you." I smile at her thoughtfulness and get up to let her get comfortable. Ally lies down on the couch, opening her legs for me to sit between. She grabs the blanket that was on the edge of the couch and drapes it over the both of us. Her arms are on either side of me, resting on my stomach and tracing soothing patterns.

I awake to feeling Ally's warmth beneath me. I quickly sat up realizing I must have dozed off. Clearly Ally had been awake though as she was quick to say "hey, it's okay come back." I turned to face her, still in her lap "Ally how long was I asleep??" Ally calmly says "About an hour why?" My eyes widen "Ally the kids! School!" Ally chuckles "sweetheart I have it taken care of. My nanny was more than fine to watch them all. School only finished a half hour ago, don't worry. Plus you needed the rest" I sigh and lean back into Ally. "Thank you." Ally kisses the top of my head. "I just want to stay like this for a few more minutes. Then I think we should go get them." Ally nods. She brings a hand to gently run through my tousled hair "of course." I turn to face her and kiss her deeply. I can feel her smile into the kiss and she tangles her hand into my hair deepening our kiss.

After a few moments we both break away. I rest my forehead on hers "I love you."