Sacrifice For You (Hange Zoe x Female Reader)

18: Something To Lose

His screams were only getting louder.

And far more annoying.

Levi threw his leg back, delivering another kick to the man's jaw. I grimaced at the sound of his yell, which was shrill and pleading. The sun had set long ago, and only the moonlight lit up the area around us.

"THE SURVEY CORPS WON'T LAST! YOU CRAZY BASTARD!" The man shrieked, choking on one of his many knocked-out teeth afterward. I shot Jean a concerned expression at the words, and he returned with an equally disturbed one.

My arm was aching, and not just the one that was injured. The ambush we had performed earlier on the roadblock was quite the success, but only using one hand on a shotgun made the usual kickback more daunting and harsh.

Not to mention I almost shot Sasha and Connie by accident due to my god-awful, horrendous aim. Twice.

Another sickeningly loud cracking sound broke the short-lived silence, and the man wailed in pain. I sighed, sitting down against a distant tree to conceal myself from the scene taking place between the MP and the Captain.

It wasn't long before my thoughts began swirling the same way they had been for the past few hours. Armin's words were playing on an incessant loop, and it seemed that the pause button was either hidden dangerously well, or completely nonexistent.

Was he right? Am I truly so goddamn terrified of believing that they care about me because I value the opinion of a dead man so dearly?

But he wasn't just a dead man. He was Will.

And... fuck. Armin was, and is, right. As always.

I peered down at the ground, allowing the night breeze to flutter over my skin. My ability to think logically had been lost in the sea of emotions I'd been thrown into over the past few months and had completely clouded my judgment as well. A shiver ran down my back.

Furthermore, by now, Hange could be on their way to rot in a cell, or worse. I tucked my chin to my chest, and a sudden urge to itch my skin so hard that it turned raw came over me. A revolting feeling rose in my stomach simultaneously, and I squeezed my eyes shut so hard that I'd surely be seeing nonexistent stars when I opened them.

There was no way it could've been both Will and I sitting here as Armin said. The Female Titan surely would have taken one of us out, no doubt.

And although Hange made the call, one that arguably wasn't theirs to make, they don't get to decide whether or not it was the right decision to make. It's mine. For all of my dead comrades, not just Will. Oluo, Petra, Gunther, Eld...

They all died so I get the chance to live. So that humanity can one day thrive and the Titans can be overcome. I bear the burden of furthering humanity's lifespan so that their deaths will not be in vain. And as for the question if I can forgive them for it... if I can trust them...

"Someone's coming!" Sasha called out, and I snapped my head in the direction of her voice. Connie had his hands behind his ears, listening to the sounds of the forest with his mouth formed into an 'O' shape.

The distant sound of rustling grass caused my mind to go blank, but soon sent the rest of us into action. I noticed Jean roll behind a tree, holding his gun up in a stiff manner, and Armin dropped to the ground next to him.

Not wasting another second, I opened my eyes, gritted my teeth, and forced myself upward into a crouching position. My shoulder responded with a blazing sensation, and I bit my tongue to keep from making a sound.