I hate the number two
As that's how I've always been
Since high school,
I've walked on the edge of the sidewalk
I've watched happy couples walk hand in hand
I've backed away from every opportunity
I've been ignored by others
"So, I-" I would say for the first time
"So, I" I would try again
Third times a charm, right?
"So, I-" and no one acknowledges my existence.
Now, Its just me and a bunch of fictional characters who dont even know my name or where I come from but I am still here for them as I've realised I could never form a friendship like that.
So, I form relationships with the characters in books.
I idealize romance and love,
In hoped it will one day fill this good in my heart and this voice in my head telling me I will never be enough.
I pretend my eyes don't glow blue or green whenever I see videos of my friends doing everything together
I want to be liked.
I want to be loved.
I want everyone to stop leaving.
I want to be seen
I want to be heard
And I want to be someone's world
But that isn't realistic for a second choice.
