The Joker | Scaramouche

𝟎𝟓 | 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐃

♥

It was a lovely morning- though it was the complete opposite for the sixth harbinger. The dark bags under his eyes matched well with the equally dark holes that glared into the walls, both the color of the neverending abyss. His demeanor wasn't better off as each little sound his subordinates made, he had to point out and scold them for it.

Squeak.

"WHO THE FUCK FARTED?!" he stopped abruptly and bellowed. His voice echoed throughout the hallway and one of his men gulped.

"T-That was my shoe, sir."

"..." Scaramouche lets out a raspy breath, one of a beast's. "Listen here, you little shit, if I say it's fart then it's fart. Do not twist my words."

"Y-Yes!" the man cowered under his oppressive rule. His teeth chattered as the lord he served sighs in fatigue.

"Can't even have one moment of silence..." he mutters.

In reality, he was behaving harsher than usual because of the detestable lips and eyes that kept reappearing in his mind. No matter how silent it was, nothing could get rid of her. She was like honey, sweet and provoking but if you fell for the trap and reached out to her, countless bees would swarm you in malice.

With a long guttural groan, Scaramouche trudged down the hallway, his hands tugging at his hair.

He was about to go insane.

"Hey, comrade!" a cheery voice then greets him. Childe had come around the corner with his annoying grin. He always manages to come by with his bad timing and infuriating exuberance.

At the sight of the other male, his grin was replaced with a face of surprise.

"Damn, what happened to you? You look like a dead zombie!"

"The hell is a zombie...?"

"Seriously? Forget the fact that you don't even know what a zombie is, did you get any sleep last night?" he examined Scaramouche's face closely, spying his panda eyes.

Of course he didn't. He stayed up all night thinking of someone.

"That clown is a vixen, I tell you," the Balladeer hissed. "I don't know what witchcraft she did but I can't get her out of my head."

"You mean Joker? Hahaha!" Tartaglia's laugh took over the palace. "She seduced you? Unbelievable! I heard she is planning on going to Mondstat with La Signora."

"Mondstadt? With that woman?!" Scaramouche exclaims. "Why can't she just stay still like a good clown?!"

"Clowns are bad," Childe snorts. "Anyway, I have other business. I'll leave her to you!" He made it seem like the Tsaritsa had given the task of observing Y/n to him despite that not being the case.

The ginger man runs off, leaving the other harbinger alone with his soldiers.

"Tsk. You guys," he turns and faces the kneeling men and women. "I'll be taking a trip to Mondstadt. You must come when I call. Otherwise, just hide yourselves while following me."

"Yes, my lord."

-

"Woohoo! Monster state here I come!" Y/n cheers, sitting atop a ruin guard's palm.

She had always wanted to ride such an interesting and outstanding mode of transportation ever since she saw Aether during their first meeting.

Meanwhile, La Signora had zero interest in correcting her as she scanned the green fields, feeling foreign in the midst of the warm weather. They were halfway there to Mondstat after teleporting through a portal and traveling with ruin guards that obeyed their command.

"Hey, Signora, why are you going to Mondstadt anyway?" Y/n asked despite knowing the reason. She didn't want to seem suspicious, even though the cold woman had already raised her radars in alarm.

"I believe we aren't on such friendly terms for you to call my name like that," she shot a look at Y/n, causing her to shiver in thrill. The question asked had been completely ignored.

"Don't be so cold... you won't attract anyone if you're going to be like that!" Y/n huffs. If she hadn't been so far away from La Signora, she would've pinched the woman's cheek no matter how risky it would be.

"What good will attracting people do?" she scoffs, crossing her arms. Y/n was a bit stunned since she didn't expect her to reply.

"You are like a tsundere..." she giggles.

"A what?" La Signora's eye twitched. She did not understand the term but she didn't receive any good intentions from it.

"Ahem, anyway... what do you like to do in your free time?"

"Give up on the small talk. I have no interest in befriending you," she cuts to the chase with a glare.

"Geh! I can feel the harsh Snezhnaya breeze from here! You are so cold~!" Y/n pouts as the harbinger sighs, not hiding the fact that she was ticked off.

'If only someone would come and take this vexing girl-'

La Signora did not even have the time nor will to express her gratitude when a familiar voice had echoed across the fields basked under the afternoon sun. Y/n jolted and turned back to see the man she had teased delightfully the day before and couldn't help but smile in glee.

He looked horrible.

"GET DOWN HERE RIGHT THIS INSTANT, YOU WITCH!" Scaramouche roars. His commanding voice contrasted considerably from his agonizingly slow yet refined steps. His eyes glowered under the sunlight, causing it to shine in a warming brilliance which Y/n has never seen before.

"First it's a clown and now I'm a witch? Make up your mind," Y/n rolls her eyes as he was finally within reach.

"Remove the witchcraft you placed on me!" he indignantly looks up at her, careful not to look directly into her eyes. He didn't want to be pulled into her charms again.

"Witchcraft? What do you mean?" she smirked, a finger on her lips. The playful expression further enraged the man below her.

"You wanna go at it again?" he then proposes, crossing his arms. "I'll have you moaning under me like a bitch, how about that?"

"What vulgar words... you should really bleach that small mouth of yours."

"Excuse me?"

"You are excused, dear Scara-mooch-muah," Y/n blows a kiss before tapping on the ruin guard's palm in morse code. The machine began to rattle and shake before lifting its leg and forcefully trampling on the grass to Mondstat.

La Signora had already traveled a few yards ahead, tired of the incessant quarrel between the two. She had a great urge to abandon both of them in the middle of an island where they would never find their way out. However, she assumed that she couldn't face the two of you at the same time so she gave up on the idea.

"Damned woman," Scaramouche did not attempt to chase after Y/n and instead stood there, gazing at her retreating figure. "But since it's almost nighttime, I'm sure you will find the need to camp outside... what a perfect opportunity..."

'To test your powers...'