Of Monsters and Men

Chapter 7 - Of Banquets, Bastards, and Burials

Grumbling in disgust at the messy monster slaying you and Geralt had just endured at the frozen lake nearby, you hastily burst through the wooden doors of the local tavern where Jaskier and the other villagers currently are. He's trying to get the gory details from some man who insisted on accompanying you both on your hunt, resulting in him fleeing the scene covered in chunks of globby Selkiemore blood from a blow you landed onto the creatures opened eye.

Right before the beast swallowed Geralt, his silver sword cleanly slicing through the creatures stomach and finally putting an end to the tiresome hunt. Just like that, done and done. You watch as the tavern goers faces grimace at the gnarly scent protruding from yourself and Geralt, your crimson eyes catching the delighted sight of your laughing bard as he finds you two easily in the crowd.

You walk up to the table that the bard is sitting at, "What's that stench?" Questions the man by Jaskier's side, you glare at him like he's the biggest dumbfuck in the whole Continent. Your body is spotted in splayed monster guts likewise to Geralt who's almost unrecognizable by how much blood and innards coats his face. What else would cause such a scent?

"Selkiemore guts. Had to get it from the inside." Replies Geralt bluntly.

"We'll take what we're owed." You add, the man nods as he quickly reaches into his jacket to pull out the sack of coin. Jaskier taking this time to begin singing his famous Toss a coin to your Witcher ballot, the whole entirety of the tavern happily joining in as he gets out of his seat.

Not caring to join them you turn to walk away from the masses, Geralt trailing behind as you make a beeline for the wooden keg, "Fuck me I need a drink." You exclaim before filling up a mug and quickly downing it like there's no tomorrow, Geralt chuckling as he does the same. When you pull the cup from your lips does the bard make himself known.

 He leans against the counter all the while rambling on about how you two owe him for making yourselves so famous now. Wordily explaining how for a single night he'll need you both to watch out for him as he and the two of you attend some princess' banquet, though you're not entirely sure what he's on about considering you're too distracted by the free beer.

Setting an empty mug upon the wooden counter you roll your eyes, done with his excessive disjointed talking, you turn to leave as Geralt follows your lead towards the stairs, Jaskier calling out something of possible interest to sway your minds.

"Food, women, and wine, Geralt!" Shouts Jaskier, stopping Geralt in his tracks as you turn around.

Jaskier looks at him hopefully as Geralt lets out a tired sigh, "I already have Y/N." Grumbles your tired Witcher as you walk over next to him, a spark of interest tugging at the inner adventurer in you.

"I haven't had a kingly meal in ages, nor have I worn a silken dress in almost a decade." You add with a humored laugh, turning your attention to Geralt, "I bet you'd love to see me in silk and jewels, now wouldn't you my love?" You purr into his ear while lightly touching his dirty arm, he looks at you with a telling half grin.

——

You watch as Jaskier paces in front of the two of you with a small cloth draped casually over the side of his shoulder while he contemplates how tonight should go for him, that is if everything goes well and no lords try and kill him. Since you took a much needed bath earlier, you get the privilege of cleaning off Geralt as your talkative bard continues his ramblings about the party tonight.  Grasping the small bucket in your hands you crouch behind Geralt, dumping a warm bucket of water onto your grumpy Witcher's gut smeared head, you hold in your giggles as he sputters and wipes his face from the sudden tiny waterfall to his head and face.