Part 1: Harry

25 3 2
                                    

Disclaimer: Before you guys say I'm sexualizing a child, first of all, I'm a child too. Second of all look into the Euphoria Larry scene before saying I'm disrespectful. I am not a girl so please don't say I'm fetishizing mlm.

Also, I just wanna say this isn't 100% based off of how I think the boys actually act, a lot of this is just for story purposes.

Trigger warning: Self harm

There's content warnings on the chapters that have smut.

"I've gotta get to class. See you at lunch?", I asked. Zayn nodded as hugged me and headed off into Corridor B.

I walked through the cold hallways, anxiously trying to avoid any of the boys I knew from the football team. Or in other words, trying to avoid Louis & his other friends that used this route.

As I approached my English class, I noticed a blonde boy walking in. I stopped to double check the room number, despite having already entered it for every day the past two terms. It was the right room after all. The boy must've been new.

I sat down in my usual seat, resting my bag down & taking out my things as always. "Are you Niall?", I overheard Mrs. Bennett ask. "Yes, Ma'am.", he answered. I noticed he had a heavy accent. "Well, it's nice to have you here with us today. You can sit right there next to Harry in the second row."

I looked up from my things to give him a smile which he returned when I noticed his blue eyes.

Blue eyes are so attractive, I thought. Not that I'm attracted to him, I like girls. Oh God, what if he thinks I'm staring at him & thinks I'm gay?

Why can't guys think other guys are attractive? Why do they have to be called gay? Girls are allowed to compliment other girls. Even if I was gay, I would probably have a crush on Louis, not Niall.

"Hi, I'm Niall. I'm new.", he introduced as he sat down next to me. "Oh hey, I'm Harry. Welcome. Wanna sit with me at lunch?" He nodded.

I spotted Niall two hours later when I was on my way to the cafeteria. When he noticed me he practically ran over to where I was so I could walk him over to the table where Zayn was already seated.

"This is Zayn", I announced, gesturing to my best friend as he smiled. "Hi, it's nice to meet you. And you are?"

"Niall."

"He's new, he just switched schools. Today's his first day.", I told told Zayn. "Oh, where did you switch schools from, Niall?"

"Ireland.", he replied bluntly. He seemed so timid. "So tell us a bit about yourself.", I said, to ease the tension. "Um, I like to write songs, I play the guitar.", he began. "I really like football"

"Oh, you should try out for the team.", I suggested. "Although I should warn you, I was on the team last year and a lot of the guys on it are really big dicks."

"They what?!", Niall questioned. "Oh, no, I mean they ARE big dicks, not they HAVE- you know..."

Zayn and Niall both chuckled. "But yeah, them, their girlfriends, and everyone else they hang out with all sit over there." As Niall's eyes followed my finger to the table where the "cool kids" sat, he appeared nervous yet intrigued.

"Wait I think I know that guy with the Justin Bieber-looking hair.", Niall exclaimed. "Liam?", questioned Zayn. "Yeah. I saw him at church. He seemed pretty nice, actually. I probably would've gone over there with him if Harry hadn't invited me to sit with you guys. I guess it's a good thing you did, eh Harry?"

"Yeah, I guess.", I laughed. "I mean, they weren't all awful. Like, I wouldn't call them bullies. They just talked a lot of shit, ya know? I think Liam is friends with Louis but he's not on the team. At least he wasn't when I was there."

"Which one's Louis?", Niall wondered. "You see that girl, in the gray hoodie?", I asked. Niall looked over, back & then nodded. "Louis is the guy who's lap she's sitting on. Louis Tomlinson has practically been the team captain for six years. The coach doesn't even let them have captains but Louis is always the leader. Whatever he says, goes."

"Wait wait wait-six years? Jesus, how long is high school in England?" I laughed, "No he's been left back."

For the rest of lunch, and the school day really, it felt like I wasn't even there. I couldn't stop think about what Niall thought I said. Although it wasn't what I had said, Niall's misperception of my words caused me to think things I wasn't sure I was supposed to be thinking.

The thought of Louis aggressively taking off his clothes to reveal himself to me as I stare at every inch of his naked body.

I was straight. Why the hell was I thinking thinking this?! Surely if I was gay he wouldn't be interested in me. He was straight. He had a girlfriend anyways. I had had girlfriends before, too. I wasn't gay...

But what if I was? Why would there be anything wrong with that? There was nothing wrong with being gay. Although it would be kind or weird hanging out with boys. What if Niall and Zayn thought I had crushes on them? I had only just met Niall today, he would probably be scared off and never wanna talk to me again.

He would probably start hanging out with the soccer team and tell them, too. What if Louis found out?

What if I did have a crush on Louis all along and I just couldn't admit it to myself?

I needed to calm down and get through the day. The thoughts wouldn't stop when Zayn and I started walked home, though.

"Wasn't Niall supposed to join us?", he asked. "Football tryouts", I explained.

I've had crushes on girls. I've liked girls. I've dated girls. I've kissed girls. But what if I like guys too? Okay if I'm gonna actually figure this out I need to stop putting it off like I always do. I admit, I might be gay and straight at the same time. What would you call that though? Isn't it just one or the other? What's it like giving a blow job?

>>>>

The minute I got home that day I started searching things up on my computer. It was just to see. No one would ever know about it. I just needed to figure some things out. I had no reason to feel guilty about it...Or so I told myself.

guyxguy⌫

Gay⌫

69⌫

Anal⌫

Blowjob⌫

Bondage⌫

Eiffel tower⌫

Double penetration⌫

369⌫

Signs you're gay⌫

What does bisexual mean?⌫

How to come out?⌫

Sexuality quiz⌫

Signs you're bisexual⌫

How to come out⌫

Lgbt community⌫

What to do when you like a straight guy⌫

Vote & comment! I hope you guys like it, ik I left y'all on a cliff hanger. Chapter 2 will be published asap.

Spoiler alert: Captain Niall will be really important later on! X

We Don't Know (Larry Stylinson)Where stories live. Discover now