One Way Ticket to the Cuckoo's Nest

Part 4_ Ms Venable and Dr. Staple

Suicidal thoughts and depression warning

I felt the sweet warm gently hitting my face, it made me smile. I felt so relaxed and cozy, it was as if I was in another dimension. One very peaceful and very far away. Like that planet in guardians of the galaxy that the guy had built in his own image. My planet would be wild... it would just be a dense forest with crazy creatures and no matter where you went you could always hear music. There would be a temple for Stivie where you could go ask for advice when you're about to lose your shit. And, most of all... no people... I mean, some people, my people... Interesting, strong, decent people, like Liz and Ms Venable... Ms Venable? Wtf? No... Don't be stupied. You just have a sleepy brain, that's all.

I heard a light buzz that drifted me away from my little thoughts. I opened my eyes with a light grunt, might as well, the last thought ruined my fantasy anyway. I saw a name appear on the screen:

Kurt:

Are you still alive you fucker?

That made me laugh. Actual laugh, it was the first time I had even genuinely smiled since I got here. He always knew how to cheer me up, I had completely forgotten to text him when I got here. Shit. He would understand. I wrote a quick "no" and laid my phone back with the screen down.

When I was setting the phone down however. Something caught my attention. I saw a strange figure reflected on my dark screen by my door. My heart skipped a beat and I jumped out of bed practically making my bed sheet fly.

It was just a woman. She was staring at me with a sweet and tender smile that did nothing to ease my heart beat. I felt like my insides were trying to fight my rib cage. I'm usually very calm and rational in this kind of situation but this for some reason just really freaked me out. I tend to trust my gut, since it's right most of the time, but after all that was happening it was only natural for me to be a little jumpy.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you, you just... seemed so peaceful. I saw you yesterday, how nervous you were, it's nice to see you smiling" the smile didn't fade at all from her face. I don't like people who smile too much but I was a bit distracted.

"That's okay, you just..." I looked don't and realised that, without my banquet my black lace underwear was exposed so I covered it with my oversize t-shirt. I didn't make a big deal about it, I believe certain situations are only embarrassing if you make them awkward "... caught me off guard I guess. I don't usually scare that easelly".

"It isn't customary to just enter without knocking around here, we were just a bit worried about you, since you didn't come down to dinner. And it's already 11 and you didn't come down for breakfast. We like to keep an eye on patients with your history"

"You don't need to sugarcoat it for me. It's okay, you can say suicide risk"

She responded with a smile, a different one than the one she had before. The last one was more like a kid on chrisman morning, this one is more professional, therapy smile. Understanding.

"I'm sorry, but I don't know who you are. You said you watched me yesterday?"

"Ohh..." she laughed. "I'm the one who should be apologizing" she extended her arm giving me her hand and said "My name is doctor Ellie Staple. I was supposed to receive you but I had a little emergency with another patient so I just watched you walk by with Liz, I believe, and then with Tate".

I am not going to force half of the forced fake smiles she is giving me right now. I can not do it before my morning coffee cup. But I still shook her hand. Wow... she just really has the deepest, most beautiful dark brown eyes, doesn't she? Black almost. I noticed that our little hand shake was probably lasting a bit too long so I ended it. I could feel my hand shaking from the little contact so I put it causally behind my back and hoped she didn't notice.