convicted || b.e

chapter fifteen

jada's pov

billie just got to my house, and we haven't even spoken. we're just sitting on my couch, both of us staring at the floor. honestly right now is a perfect time for billie to be here because my parents are at work and kace is at a friend's house.

"i'm sorry." billie speaks up.

"i'll believe it when it see it." i sigh.

"fuck jada stop being so difficult," she gets up, standing over me.

"im trying to fix things and you're acting like you couldn't care any less." she sighs.

"cause billie, every single time that we act like more than friends, we fight. and you specifically become very toxic. but every time that we're just friends, all you wanna do is fuck! pick a fucking side!" i say, standing up too so shes not hovering over me anymore.

"look, im not here to fight. but you have to understand that i'm trying too!" she defends herself.

"how are you trying? how?" i ask genuinely. of course she stays silent.

"you call me names, you say you hate me, you fuck me like you hate me," i add before being cut off.

"then let me fuck you like i love you." she whispers softly, her arms wrapping around my waist.

"ugh no billie! god you're so fucking annoying, like do you just not listen?" i exclaim, taking her arms off of me. "you fucking piss me off." i huff.

"yeah? well you piss me off too!" she shout.

"i do? then get out of my house!" i shout back.

"no i won't get out because i- i fucking care about you, okay? i said i hate you because im starting to like you so much to the point where i'd rather hate you just to avoid the feelings of liking you. even after trying to hate you, i just can't! i haven't stopped thinking about you. all i do is think about you! i know it doesn't mean anything, but i have feelings for you." she rants out.

"then start acting like you have feelings for me." i sigh while shaking my head.

"i will! i promise i will. and if i break my promise, then you can never ever speak to me again and i won't hold it against you ever. i promise." she swears.

"just don't hurt me billie. i cant go through this forever." i cry, hugging her chest.

"i won't, J. i won't." she promises, stroking my hair while hugging me close to her and wiping my tears off.

—

"thanks." i say as the waitress brings us our food out. tonight billie took me out to dinner so we could talk. i don't really know what to expect out of this, and that's making me kinda nervous.

"so ask me anything. i know that you have a lot of questions about me, so i want you to be able to know everything you wanna know about me. once and for all." billie tells me before taking a bite of her food.

"first off, i know like nothing about your personal life. who are your parents? what do they do? any siblings? where are you from?" i ask.

"i'm from la, born and raised." she softly smiles.

"uhm i'm about to say some deep shit so just get ready." she sighs, to which i nod and listen intently.

"my dad is a deadbeat, i haven't seen him since i was like six or seven. so i don't know who he is or what he does. and my mom, she died when i was fourteen. she didn't really have a profession, she just went between all different types of jobs. and as for siblings, i have a brother out there somewhere, but he left me alone and that's about all i know." she answers.