convicted || b.e

chapter six

billie's pov

within minutes i find myself getting even more high and even more intoxicated. lately my mind has been really fucking with me, and the fact that i don't know where i'll be sleeping tonight makes everything even worse.

i find myself taking a mixture of fentanyl, fireball, molly and good old fashion weed. for a brief moment as i struggle to see straight since the disco lights are quite literally blinding, i think about every moment thats led me to this point. when did shit really go south?

was it with my dad leaving? my mom dying? growing up in a violence ran, over populated, under educated and under funded hood? was it my best friend getting kill as a kid? was it my undying revengeful wishes? who fucking know.

but why stress when you can just get high?

that's been my motto for years now, and it'll continue to be my motto. i'm getting high till i'm fucking dead. even then i'll probably be high.

"yo you alright?" kobe asks me as i stumble into him.

"mannn, i'm fucking great." i say with a chuckle.

"take this." i say, handing him a small packet of molly.

"i'm good billie." he says while handing it back to me.

"you sure you should be doing that?" kobe questions as i grab his arm tightly since i really can't stand up on my own.

"yes, i am very sure. i feel better than i've ever felt in my entire life." i slur, which is the honest truth. sadly, i've never been happier.

"i feel like... amazing. so numb. i can feel the numbness in my bones." i explain slowly. i love feeling numb at this point.

after talking with kobe a little bit, i decide to wander off and go find some other people that i know. soon enough, i find myself wandering around outside in the backyard.

"yo, ain't you lamar's homie?" a random dude asks me, his face tripling as he comes closer to me.

"fuck yeah i am." i answer loudly.

"yeah? fuck him. you and kobe are next. punk ass." he says, flashing his gun.

instantly, i take his little short ass down to the ground and start beating on him. he fights back, though. with every couple of punches that i land to his face, he lands a few quick jabs into my stomach, eventually making me fall off of him. the mixture of drugs, alcohol, and this little bitch beating on me becomes a lot.

"how you like that now, huh?" he shouts from above me as he kicks me repeatedly in the stomach. colors pulsate in my sight on beat with the kicks, making everything blurry and making my head spin uncontrollably.

"stop man," i cough up, gasping for air. but he doesn't stop. he straddles me and begins punching in my face, much like i did to him. unfortunately, i'm not as strong as i thought i would be. with every blow that he send to my face, i take it. like a little bitch.

"punk!!" he shouts as he continues landing blows.

"remember this face, cause me and DL are coming back for yall." he whispers in my ear before he gets up. he kicks me in the head one last time before walking away, sending my head into even more spinning and thudding. i go to push myself up off of the ground, but my hands fall into the ground, making me literally face plant into the grass.