Touch Me [sakuatsu]

Day 4

After practice on the fourth day when everyone else was gone, they resumed their usual positions on the wooden bench in front of Sakusa's locker. Again, Atsumu purposefully sat a little closer than the day before and today Kiyoomi noticed.

His back stiffened a little when Atsumu sat down. The closeness made him a little anxious. But he forced himself to relax so the lessons could start.

"Wanna start with hands again?" asked Atsumu gently.

"Sure," replied Sakusa. This time he took the initiative and reached his hand over to link with Atsumu's. Miya smiled and they sat there for a few minutes, just holding hands. Sakusa was looking at the floor and Atsumu was looking at Sakusa, whose profile he found striking. The cut of his jaw, his straight nose, that jet black hair draped over his forehead, that... wait, what? What am I thinking? He's my teammate and my friend. I shouldn't be checking him out. He mentally shook himself and looked away, embarrassed at the directions his thoughts had gone in.

When Sakusa raised his gaze from the floor to look at his teammate, Atsumu swore he could read the look in those dark eyes. Kiyoomi wanted praise, at least he was pretty sure that's what he was reading in his teammate's eyes.

Atsumu gave Sakusa's hand a quick, gentle squeeze. "Yer getting really good at this, Omi-kun." He could swear he saw a flash of gratefulness in the spikers eyes.

"Want to practice the wrist and arms again like yesterday?"

Sakusa drew his hand from the blonde's and moved it to his wrist. He gripped it loosely and held it there for a couple of minutes. Meanwhile, Atsumu was feeling ... funny. The heat from Kiyoomi's hand seemed to be burning a brand in his skin. What the hell is happening here?

Atsumu must have had a funny look on his face because Sakusa was suddenly concerned and asked tentatively, "Is this okay?"

Atsumu's head snapped up and he forced a grin. "Yeah, it's fine. Sorry, I was thinkin' of somethin'." Atsumu was a bit embarrassed but swore to shake it off. It worked for a little while until Kiyoomi moved his hand up his arm and left it there. Yep, something was definitely happening because Atsumu felt something... strange. He realized he wanted and enjoyed this touch. The idea was disconcerting to say the least, so he shoved it aside and tried to concentrate on the task at hand.

After a few minutes had passed, Kiyoomi pulled his hand from Atsumu's arm and again, Atsumu thought he was seeking praise, so he gave it. "Yer doing a great job at this!" Sakusa's eyes sparkled a bit at his friend's words.

Atsumu continued, "Now I'm going to touch yer wrist and arms, okay?" He repeated the touches that he had received from the spiker before asking if Kiyoomi was ready to go forward.

"I'm going to move my hand up now onto your upper arm. I may touch under the sleeve (Sakusa was wearing a short sleeved t-shirt). Is that okay?"

Sakusa nodded. He was trying to keep his cool but it was difficult. He had had feelings for Atsumu for almost as long as they had played together. He loved his skill on the court, yes, but he also loved Atsumu's mischievous grin, teasing nature and upbeat personality. And he thought Atsumu was hot. Not that he'd ever admit such a thing to anyone. Unless that person happened to be deaf. Or dead.

In fact, this whole thing started because Kiyoomi had been wanting to get closer to Atsumu. He wanted to be able to touch and yes, kiss, the setter and all those other things that came after. That was why he was so upset that first day. Because he wanted to touch and feel Miya, but he had been reminded, in a cruel way, that he was afraid to touch anyone.

He had almost told Miya that first that he liked someone and that was why he was so upset, but he had chickened out. So now he was touching someone and that someone was his crush. It was almost too much for him to handle. He tried to calm his breathing. His anxiety climbed a bit as the thought popped into his head, He's touching me! Once again, Kiyoomi tried to steady his nerves with a deep breath. I can do this. It's not a big deal.

While he was thinking all of these thoughts, Atsumu had moved his hand up above Kiyoomi's elbow to grip his bicep. Sakusa was a bit taken aback when Miya said, "Shit, Omi-kun, how much are ya workin' out these arms? They're rock hard."

Kiyoomi quickly glanced at Atsumu, looking for any signs of sarcasm or ill-intent. He wasn't always good at talking with people but thought he could read them pretty well when he observed them. What he saw now was not sarcasm; Atsumu really was impressed with his muscles. Damn, why does that make me this happy? I'm an idiot.

When Miya started slowly moving his hand down from Sakusa's bicep to his forearm, wrist and finally his hand, he realized he had been holding a breath. This actually felt good and it surprised him. He liked the feel of the warmth of Atsumu's palm on his skin, and he got a little tingly at the caresses. Shit. This was good. This felt good. And he wasn't even freaking out. He was too busy thinking about Miya's hands on his skin. Unbidden, images of the blonde touching more than his arms arose in his brain. Okay, now he was freaking out. He jumped up, alarmed.

Atsumu was worried he did something wrong, "Omi-kun, I'm sorry! Did I... was I ... did ya not like it?"

Kiyoomi was standing just to Atsumu's side. He ran one hand through his hair as he closed his eyes and tried to steady his racing heart and clear his hazy mind. After a few beats he opened his eyes to look down at his friend, who yes, looked hurt.

"No, I'm fine. I'm sorry. I just ... got a little nervous for a minute. It was okay. Really."

Atsumu wasn't convinced, "Are ya sure?"

Sakusa repeated, "Yes. I'm sorry. It was fine, really."

Atsumu looked relieved, "So, do ya want to keep goin' now or stop for today?" Sakusa considered and thought he had probably had as much contact as he could handle for one day.

"Let's stop for today, if you don't mind."

"Nah, it's all good," replied Miya and he got to his feet and faced his friend. "But I do have to talk to ya about somethin'."

Kiyoomi was troubled again. What was this about? Was he calling this whole thing off?

"Dontcha worry, Omi-kun, it's nothin' bad. I just..." He paused before continuing, "I just thought maybe we shouldn't continue doin' this in the locker room. Someone could ... come in and get the wrong idea."

Or the right idea, thought Sakusa wryly. Instead he asked, "What do you suggest?"

"Well we could go to my dorm, or yers if yer more comfortable there." Sakusa considered. Atsumu was right. They shouldn't be touching like this in public. It was... weird. People already thought he was strange enough without giving them more fodder. So he agreed.

"I think I'd feel better in my room. Is that okay?"

"Sure! We'll go after the match tomorrow if that's okay with ya."

Sakusa nodded and reached for his jacket and bag. "It's great. Thanks again, Miya-san." He managed a small smile, which Atsumu returned with a big grin, and they both left the locker room to head home for the night.