A Product of War [Hetalia]

Chapter 14.

To say that Alfred was surprised when Italy suddenly called him was an understatement.

He had finally gone back to his home. After helping Ivan and Matthew settle in and figure out a plan going forward.

And now, he was finally able to relax with his boyfriend. Talk over what they would do about their current situation while also assisting Matthew and Ivan. As Kiku found an excuse to stay out of his country for a little longer.

America🇺🇸: Oh, Italy? What are you doing here, dude?

Kiku turned his head to the door as soon as he heard Italy's formal name. And got up to look. Frowning with concern as he saw Feliciano shaking.

Japan🇯🇵: Feli, do you want to come in? Sit down?

Feli nodded, Alfred and Kiku helping him over somewhere. Kiku having a suspicion of what was bothering Feli. As he had experience with Alfred going through something negative as well, with similar symptoms.

Japan🇯🇵: What's the matter, Feliciano?

Italy looked down at the ground, suddenly regretting bothering the pair. But it would look weird if he just pretended that nothing was wrong and left. He didn't have another option.

N. Italy🇮🇹: Um... Alfred? When the other nations picked on you years ago, how did you work through it?

Alfred's eyes widened slightly. He had been preparing to hear some negative things, but he somehow didn't consider bullying as something that would have been happening.

America🇺🇸: I... I'm not sure. I guess I made it through with the help of the people close to me. Francis, Kiku, Matthew. People who supported me and were willing to help when I reached out.

Italy looked up then. Confusion lacing his voice.

N. Italy🇮🇹: But, wait... Isn't it weak to depend on others...? Or does that apply to me only...?

Kiku's eyes narrowed with concern, his voice dropping to a softer pitch.

Japan🇯🇵: That is one of the things they criticize you for, isn't it?

Feliciano nodded.

N. Italy🇮🇹: I'm still confused. I was always told that to be strong, I had to be independent. That I was an annoyance and a lesser nation for asking for help and venting my emotions. I thought that was what Ludwig wanted. But when I stopped sharing my emotions, it only caused more problems! I don't know what's wrong with me...

Kiku tilted his head.

Japan🇯🇵: Before you at least heard the criticisms, how was your relationship with Ludwig?

Feli smiled a bit, reminiscing about his memories with Ludwig before everything went downhill.

N. Italy🇮🇹: It was great... At least from my perspective. We both shared our feelings, vented when we got frustrated, and constantly worked to keep our relationship strong. Whenever there was a problem, we'd voice it immediately. But then I walked in on that conference, and I found out Ludwig agreed with what the others said about me. So I tried to change to be better, and that only made things worse.

Alfred frowned.

America🇺🇸: Are you sure he really did agree?

Feli looked back up, replying a little louder than he meant to.

N. Italy🇮🇹: I'm fairly certain! So that was why I was confused when Luddy started getting distant as well. I don't know if it was because he thought I wasn't trying hard enough, or...

America🇺🇸: Did you stop telling him how you felt about things?

Italy nodded.

N. Italy🇮🇹: Yes! I even started parroting what the others said about strength. Maybe he thought that was annoying!

Kiku glanced down sadly.

Japan🇯🇵: Or, maybe that caused you to stop communicating with one another. I'm not saying you did it intentionally, but knowing Ludwig, the only reason he hides how he feels about things, is because he's worried about being seen as weak. He doesn't feel like he can talk to anyone when he's overwhelmed or scared.

Feli paused, he did know all of this. In fact, Ludwig only seemed to trust explaining his feelings to him, and his brother.

N. Italy🇮🇹: What does that mean then...?

Japan🇯🇵: It means, unintentionally or otherwise... You might have made Ludwig uncomfortable sharing his feelings with you. If you started parroting what the others said about "strength", that would be the kind of thing that would make him hesitant to open up. Wasn't Gilbert still missing at that time, too?

Suddenly, it hit Feliciano hard.

Of course what Feli said would make Ludwig shut himself up about his feelings. Of course he would start bottling up his stress. Of course this would ruin their communication.

Hell, the whole reason they worked so well was because of how open they were to one another. But that was ruined because of Feli listening in on that one conference. And because of that one lie...

The phone suddenly rang, Kiku getting up to answer it, as Alfred would be best to help Feli through how the other nations were treating him.

Japan🇯🇵: Hello?

—Germany🇩🇪: Kiku? This is you, ja?

Kiku blinked.

Japan🇯🇵: Um, yes. It is. How did you know I was here?

—Germany🇩🇪: I tried calling you earlier and your boss said you were elsewhere. And I knew you were friends with Alfred so I figured I could ask him. I just want to know if you have seen Feli or not.

Kiku glanced behind him at the two talking nations.

Japan🇯🇵: Feli is here with Alfred and me, actually.

—Germany🇩🇪: How is he...?

Kiku rubbed the back of his neck.

Japan🇯🇵: Not great. But he's talking to Alfred, which seems to be helping.

Just as Kiku said that, he turned his head and saw Feliciano hugging Alfred and crying.

Japan🇯🇵: Or, not. Hold on, you can come over if you think it's important. But I need to hang up, is that okay?

—Germany🇩🇪: Of course. I'll go over, thank you.

The call ended then. Kiku going into the other room to see what was happening.

N. Italy🇮🇹: I—I didn't want to give him away! I didn't know what else I could do!

Kiku blinked. What did they just get themselves in the middle of?