Serendipity

Chapter 21

Chapter 21

Anong gusto niyang gawin ko? Donate my heart to Kaori?

Mamamatay ako para kay Kaori?

That's madness! We're just teenagers! I have so many plans and dreams. At may mga pangarap rin akong gustong itupad kasama si Kaori. And that would be impossible if I die for her.

I admit it then, I'm not that crazy for her that I would give my heart. And that's literally.

I groaned and messed up my hair. Tinalon ko ang kama at mahigpit na niyakap ang aking unan.

Gusto kong maintindihan ng Nine na iyon na hindi ako ganoon kabobo at kabaliw para gawin ang bagay na iyon.

And I know for sure that Kaori will never allowed that.

She doesn't have the right to criticize my feelings for Kaori. We're just kids and... I'm to young to even think about death.

But why do I feel guilty?

Ayaw ko bang gumaling si Kaori? Kasi ayaw kong mamatay ang Nine na iyon?

She's Kaori's dearest friend. Anong gagawin ni Kaori kapag malaman niyang ang pusong binigay sa kaniya ay galing sa kaibigan niya?

There might be other options. Mayroon na man siguro kaming mahanap na donor na nasa coma or brain dead, hindi ba?

I am awake the whole night thinking about everything. Kaori's condition, Nine's donation, my feelings for Kaori.

And in the end, I feel so fucking guilty.

In the end, I realized that I am not worth it. That Kaori don't deserve a guy like me.

Because, maybe my feelings for her are really not that strong. That someday, it will vanish like a fog or loses it's passion as the time goes by.

Kaori's very special. Ibang-iba sa mga babaeng nakilala ko. The reason I somehow feel in love with her is that she reminds me of my mom who's sweet yet crazy.

She's practically not the kindest person ever. But she's probably the bravest and positive person I've ever known. Palangiti at bibong-bibo. She's sweet and daring. She's the cutest, the most adorable person for me.

But let's not forget that this girl is the most annoying person I've met. Ang maldita at baliw na si Kaori. Palaging nakakainis at palaging topakin.

I feel in love with her in a span of two months. Ganiyan kadali at napaamin ako agad.

Because, what's there not to love? Everything about her is mu favorite.

That's why I am guilty right now.

Kaori... She deserves someone better. Iyong lalaking kayang itaya ang buhay niya para sa kaniya.

And I am not that guy.

Sino lang naman ako para mahalin niya?

I'm nothing but an introverted bastard who is rude and cold.

I've brought nothing but complications to Kaori.

Kaya sa linggong iyon ay napagdesisyonan kong iwasan muna si Kaori. I want to sort out my feelings and emotions. I want to atleast make a decision. But my opinion is worthless, I don't have any power to control everything, even fate.

Iniwasan ko siya sa buong linggo. That was a jerk move, really.

My eyes fixed on a small high schooler waving her hands and widely smilling at me. Nasa gilid siya ng daan, mukhang naghihintay.