You let her die.
It was still a very serious accusation by Rin's brother.
Despite Gun's attempts to feign indifference to everything that happened once he stepped into this place, he cannot suppress the uneasiness that is clawing inside his stomach. Off lives in turmoil, harbouring hatred that is directed towards no other but himself and accusing himself of everything that lay beyond his control. He cares for Gun, quite sweetly so, but Gun can't understand if it is out of Off's sense of guilt at not being able to protect his loved one or if there's something else.
And if there's something else at all, he's willing to gamble and scramble the fruits of it. A tiny spark of hope.
If not, the outcome would become quite painful to him.
In other words, this Off is not the Off with whom his sister had been hopelessly infatuated. But it hardly seems the matter now because he has moved into that same trap his sister had fallen. Perhaps more deeper than her.
Gun steps outside. The chilly night air is more of a comfort than his muddled thoughts. It wills himself to relax, give a rest to his ever worrying mind. That little relaxation he managed to garner soon leaves him as he could see the source of his worry standing in the dark sporting a cigarette.
"I didn't know that Off smokes.'' Gun squints his eyes sporting a judgmental look and tries to get Off's attention.
Off stands leaning on the railing, eyes all but carrying an incurable loneliness. It's that resignation to solitude which unsettles Gun as if he has decided that the void inside of himself cannot be filled no matter what.
"She made me quit.'' Off says casually as if that gives him the license to smoke again.
Th smoke whirls, shifting dangerously in the air like a genie out of a lamp, tingling Gun's nostrils and making him feel dizzy. He coughs unable to bear that nauseating stench.
Off puts his cigarette on the ground and tramples it mercilessly,
"I guess I shouldn't do this around you.''
"Then I'll have to stay with you always. Always so that you'll never smoke.'' Gun beams. It sounds like a promise, firm and unbreakable.
"You say that now but soon enough you'll get tired of me.'' Off says focusing his gaze on a spot somewhere in the distant darkness.
"Wanna bet on that?'' Gun's already decided to make a gamble and this question simply comes out as a result of his resolve.
Now Off is looking at him as if he is trying to reach a conclusion, all the while their eyes are locked into each other. If anyone thinks it as a cliche scene of a romantic drama, where the protagonists lose themselves in each others' eyes, Gun won't blame them but Gun feels like he's a hopeless second lead with only heartbreaks thrown in his way. The strong presence of Off's girlfriend, (his fiance was it?) rings a bell in his head.
Until…
"Adorable''
The word escapes Off's mouth shocking both Gun and Off. Gun could feel his cheeks burning up into crimson red but thankfully the night is dark enough to conceal his blushing. In this low night, it's equally difficult to gather Off's expression but Gun feels the weight of that powerful gaze concentrated on himself.
Suddenly the realization hits him, he really wants this. He really wants Off.
Because after a very long time in this moment Gun no longer feels alone.
YOU ARE READING
Rain to Sea
FanfictionGun is dealing with the grief of his sister, Emma's untimely death and in this process he discovers one of her guarded secrets that turns his life upside down. Off, on the other hand, is very much absorbed in grief. The guilt of losing his childho...
