Trust me, babe

Chapter 20

Kathryn

Suddenly it made all the sense why Kenzie had been so adamant about spending the whole afternoon to make us look better. Suddenly I knew exactly why I was wearing these new red pants, red nailpolish and a lot of hairspray all paid for by Kenzie. And suddenly I knew what it was Kenzie had seemed to know that I didn't.

"We need to wash our hands," I told the guys and pulled Kenzie with me to the bathrooms at the back of the restaurant, feeling relief as the bathroom door slammed shut behind us hiding us from Jacky and Samson's smiling faces.

I loved ladies' bathrooms. They were some of the too few guy free zones in my life.

The bathroom smelled like a mix of toilet and lavendel and there were blue and purple fake flowers on the white marble counters. The sinks and the taps were gilded and so was the mirror frame — though I was sure it was fake gold, just like so many things in life. The bathroom was lit only dimly. It was as if the whole bathroom had tried to look cozy and romantic.

There was nobody at the sinks but I didn't walk to them and start washing my hands with the white soap cube which was currently resting on a gilded plate among round white stones and smelling like lavendel. Instead I glanced towards the stalls to make sure there was no one there to hear our upcoming conversation. Then I turned around to glare at Kenzie.

"You planned this, didn't you?" I snapped, my blue eyes sparkling with anger.

"Planned what?" Kenzie asked, trying to look clueless. But she was clearly feeling a bit uncomfortable which gave her away: she wasn't clueless, not really.

"Don't try to play innocent," I ordered. "It's clear you're behind this. You invited Samson here. And to make sure it'd be as awkward as possible you made sure I'd look styled enough to look like I was trying to impress while 'enjoying' my dinner here at this syrupy wanna-be-romantic restaurant you booked us a table in before heading for a walk at the Opera House in a, how did you call it, 'romantic sunset'."

"Okay, maybe I did invite him," Kenzie said, looking straight at me with her chocolate brown eyes. "But there's no need to make such a number about it. Honestly, Kathryn, sometimes it's really hard to understand you. Why are you reacting like this?" It was clear from her eyes that she was genuinely confused.

"You know what happened last summer," I said quietly.

Kenzie shifted her weight from one leg to another, avoiding my eyes. She seemed a bit awkward.

"You know I no longer want to have anything to do with guys," I continued.

"I know you've said so," Kenzie admitted. "But honestly Kathryn, it's been a year since that happened. You shouldn't let it destroy your possibilities of meeting someone and enjoying a happy and healthy relationship with someone. Not everyone is like Mikey. Samson clearly isn't. He seems so sweet."

"How do you know?" I asked, throwing my hands in the air with exasperation. "How do you know he's any different? And even if he's different does it mean he's any better?"

"Well, you're right," Kenzie said. "I don't know. But neither of us ever will if you don't give him a chance. Please give him a chance Kathryn. Give yourself a chance. A chance to find someone you can be happy with. Don't let Mikey take it away from you and destroy your life. Don't give Mikey that much power."

I looked at my feet to escape the pleading look on Kenzie's face. Now it was my turn to awkwardly shift my weight from one leg to another.

"It's my life to choose over. If I don't want anyone close to me it's my choice," I mumbled, though I wasn't feeling as certain anymore.