Peanut Butter Fingerprints

Chapter Twenty

"The Words of a Wise King"

~•~

"The truth." Dumbledore sighed. "It is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution."

-J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

~•~

America

IT WAS FUNNY TO THINK how easily I recognized Aspen's touch. Somewhere in the middle of that foggy night, his fingers wrapped around mine and squeezed my hand like I was a lifeline. I immediately knew it was him by the way his hand held mine firmly and securely. He held my hand like he always held me in his heart-knowingly and steadfastly.

It wasn't like I didn't trust him. Okay, scratch that. I didn't trust him at the moment.

But when he held my hand and murmured my name, I couldn't help but feel a tug on my heart. This was Aspen-my Aspen-my knight in shining armor. I wasn't about to cast him aside. But I also wasn't about to let what power had gotten to his mind trick me even further.

"Mer? It's me. Aspen," he whispered.

I listened intently as the heart monitor to my left beeped steadily and slowly with my pulse. It was better for me to just stay in this hazy comatose; I wasn't ready to open my eyes to his traitorous face just yet.

"Look," he started quietly, and then inhaled deeply. "I'm sorry. I am. But you understand why I did what I did, right?"

No. Absolutely not. There is no excuse for what you did and you know that, Aspen.

He sighed in response to my silence.

"Guess not," he mumbled to himself and shifted to sit on the edge of the bed.

I was tempted to ram my foot into his side, but I started to slowly realize that he was giving his confession. I needed to hear this more than anything.

"I care about you, Mer. I love you. You're my best friend. And I want what's best for you. I always have. You and I both know that's gotten us in trouble sometimes, though," he admitted.

But without him doing what he thought was best for me, I would have never met Maxon. I wouldn't be in this bed right now. And Maxon wouldn't be in some foreign country's prison cell.

Sure, Aspen, it worked out the first time. But we're past hoping things work out. We're far beyond that.

"I was an arrogant ass, Mer. I shouldn't have gone behind your back, and I'm sorry. I betrayed your trust, and well, I understand if you don't trust me anymore."

He paused and shifted on the bed again. Our hands were resting in his lap now, and his thumb was tracing circles on the back of my hand.

"In all honesty, I wouldn't trust me either. I have a bad record for trying to do what's best for you and completely missing that mark. But please know that I was trying, Mer. I tried so hard to keep you safe. And I don't like seeing you struggle. It hurts seeing you suffer like this and I just-" Aspen took a shuddering breath and cursed quietly. "I never thought you'd get hurt. I had no idea what Marlee was planning. Dr. Ashlar said it was safe; he promised me."

"You know better than to take his word, Aspen," I croaked.

He sighed and looked down. "I know. What can I do to make it up to you, Mer?"

"You can start by making sure my husband's here before I give birth," I replied stiffly.

"I can't make that promise, Mer. I'm sorry," he said quietly. "But I can promise you that we're trying."