Far Away (Namjin)

twelfth

Namjoon beloved,

This is probably the last letter I'm writing you for a while. I'm not even sure you recieve or read my letters at all but I thought if there's the slightest chance you do, you might want to hear about this.
Like I mentioned in my last letter, I have decided to follow my dreams and resume my heart. I decided to go back to my studies to become a teacher. I want to help kids and teach them to be better people. I want them to realize all the beauties in life and how the world can be so hopefull as well as cruel and crazy.
The world doesn't need more people like my mom or my brother. The world needs kind, understanding people who accept and love others for what they truly are inside.
I told my mom about this and not surprisingly, she didn't take it so well and started talking (or yelling) about how I don't do anything already and now I'm trying to runaway from responsibility again. She also reminded me that I was the one who killed dad and she thinks I want to kill her too by doing this. Which I ignored since I know she's just as broken as I was a few months ago and she still hasn't found a proper person to put the blame on.
With help from Mrs. Park and my hateful brother who obviously is more comfortable with getting rid of me than having me around, she calmed down a bit. But still told me I can't go.
I'm not going to sit here and do nothing for my life because my mom might get sad. I'm going to be like you and I'm going to do what I want.
I contacted my university and they said that I can go back and resume my studies and that I don't have to start from the beginning. But they told me that I should do services and paperwork during summer as a penalty which I think is a scam and they're making me do it because they don't have enough money to hire. But I don't really care. This is what makes me happy and this is what I want to do.
I'm leaving tonight. I have packed everything and will sneak out of the house to the train station after I finished this letter. I also wrote a goodbye note to my family and Mrs. Park.
After all, I think letters are the only thing that saved my life.
If you came back this summer, don't look for me. Thank you again Namjoon for everything you have done for me. And I apologize if I ever did you any harm.

Farewell
Jin~