ROAD TRIP - namjin oneshots | bottom namjoon. ✓

22 [part 2 - 21]

3rd pov ✨🤍

The couple didn't meet after that, namjoon was lost mostly, mourning over himself, he felt so lost, contended to himself, striving to keep himself sane but he was nowhere close to it. He was still stuck on seokjin's words, there was nothing hurtful than knowing that the person who meant the world to him, was just playing tricks around him, acting around him. "Y-you never loved me" it became his routine, locking himself and damping the plushes with his undying tears, no matter how hard he tried to forget seokjin, it only backfires him by reminding him of their memories, but it was twice hurtful when he realized that all of that was nothing but acts, forged and emotionless with no feelings but hunger, the hunger for money.

Seokjin on the other hand was happy, thinking that he won on his life but things slowly started to crumble, he started to miss namjoon. He was all for this act for money but he was now...tired of it, tired of the demonish sheets which conquered him. He sat on his room and stared at the floor, he had everything, mansions,cars,money,diamonds but he was nowhere close to have happiness, peacefulness. Too late to regret, it was too late for him to realise that he actually didn't act, there were times where he would be oblivion...of himself and fell deeper into the constellation brown orbs which engulfed him with nothing but love, he found happiness there. 

"W-what did i did" he stammered to himself, for once seokjin's eyes glossed that day, for once he cried to sleep regretting everything he did, his condones, he felt treacherous, the guilt was eating him alive, stabbing his heart with daggers. "I m-miss you namjoon, i-im so sorry baby...so sorry" he whispered, lips wobbled in shame, disgust on himself, he was a monster to play gimmicks on the fragile, flawless heart. The guilt itself deprived him mad, no one stood there for him, there was no one to leech on when he needed console but he knew, namjoon will always be there for him. 

As much as he knew that this was the most stupid,cruel, and menacing act, yet he did, he knocked on the wooden surface softly. The door flung opened to reveal a maid attired woman, "How could i help you?" she quivered a civil smile adorned her lips, "N-namjoon" he whispered, ashamed to even meet anybody's eyes, it was fueling on his growing guilt. "Namjoonie? Joonie is upstairs...poor boy have been crying all day..." she sighed and shook her head. "W-why?" seokjin knew the truth behind the crying and weep yet he quivered. The maid lurked around for a while before scurrying closer to jin, "His ex-husband was a money digger, he used my poor joonie for that...i hope that he rots in hell, under the burning fire of demon, i really want that to happen....breaking a heart for money, such a disgusting creature" seokjin chuckled. "I hope so too, he really doesn't deserve namjoon" he whispered, referring to himself, the oblivious woman nodded to him. 

He offered a kind smile before turning his heels, "Hey, where are you going sir! Dont you wanna meet namjoonie?" she ushered, seokjin flaunted a soft smile. "No...not anymore" the maid stared at him confused, and shrugged seokjin was about to get in his car when the maid called for him saying that namjoon himself called for him. Namjoon had saw seokjin standing over the doorframe earlier he was battling to himself whether to get downstairs or not, but when he saw seokjin leaving he reprimanded the woman to call him. 

Both stood in the room, abruptly the sedating, and calming room felt suffocating, distressing for them, the silence was nerve wracking. "Im sorry" namjoon pursed his lips, he looked into seokjin's orbs with his misty ones, the pain,remorse and hurt was gleaming over the layers of tears. "H-how could you...how could you think this wouldn't hurt me?" he whispered, following by a stray of tear. Seokjin had no answers, no rejoinders. "I h-hope you're happy...with the money, if you want more...t-take it, i h-hate money...i hate everything, this mansion, wealth...i hate these so much" his voice cracked, came out shakily. 

"W-why couldn't you just love me back...those days...it hurts so much seokjin" a pause, pause made seokjin feel despair and halter over himself. "D-does my tears gives you happiness? S-seeing me so lost....w-why did you choose me out of all those people...wanting me to feel pathetic? D-does these give you happiness seokjin?"  every quiver, every word was daggers to seokjin, he was silent all along. "Money...money money...TAKE THAT!I DONT NEED THAT! I DONT WANT FUCKING MONEY! I n-needed love....i needed warmth....y-you fooled me with your words just for the fucking money....w-why are you even here? A-alimony? Mansion? T-take it seokjin...i really don't want them, i want nothing but a-a night without shedding tears....a smile where i don't forge it....a love where there are no lies bounded to it" namjoon sniffled and wiped off his eyes, leaving the cheeks crimson.