Subject 3033...(BWAM, Sci-fi Romance, 18+)

Chapter Twenty Four

Slightly Sexual Content Up Ahead!!

"Put me down already!" I yell whilst the sides of my fists ram into the small of man's back in repeated motions.
Inside his home, he continues to carry me till we reach upon and past the doors of his bedroom chambers where he proceeds inside and pours me onto the softness of bed with a bounce. I look upon him, glower upon him as my eyes narrow into thinly slits. Unknotting booted feet, I toss them carelessly upon the floors and rise atop the bed inorder to level my face with man's. And he appears non-too-amused.

"What exactly is wrong with you, Noe?" I speak whilst I battle against the urge to scream in his face.
His expressions remain a sheet of nothingness and that boils my blood to levels unfathomable. Man folds arms before his chest, looks upon me as though waiting for me to carry on with my monologue. And I do.
"Why did you do that, Noe? You say one thing then do the other. If you recall correctly, you said to me that whatever it was that was going on between the two of us must come to an end. And then now...this?"

My brows knit, the bile lifts and falls inside the walls of my throat, a horrid pang clings to my heart like a blood-thirsty leech. Yet man remains mute, remains as calm as the freshly waters of a mountain crater.
"Do you think you have the right to do this to me? Push me this way then that way?"
No response on man's end, just a tranquil stillness. I pinch the bridge of my nose, exasperated. I release one long, sharply breath.

"You think you had the right to treat Zoar as you did? After going up the podium with Gillian?"
"Oh, so that's his name?"
"What is wrong with you, Noe! You're now with Gillian. You danced with her tonight. You told me to drop whatever feelings I had for you. You told me she was just your friend!"
"And you danced with that man, Tallulah. Didn't you?" Calm, his tone rings calm.
I loath it. I loath that stupid serenity he clings to.

"Oh, don't you dare, Noe! Don't you even think about turning this around and putting it on me, do you hear me?" My voice breaks a little though I will it not to, my lip begins to quiver, the wells begin to gather and cloud my vision.
I swallow. I clench my jaw and fists. Tightly, my eyes clench shut. The emotions emerge so strongly. A hint of rage, a sprinkle of betrayal, a touch of melancholia. The tension lifts and floats and hangs thickly in the chamber as I work to cool myself. One sheep, two sheep, three sheep. Then...

I feel as man's palms tenderly find my waist. Mind and body battle for subjugation. Mind clings to rationality and hurt. Body craves comfort. And I choose mind over body as I work to wriggle myself free from touch. As I work to pry fingers off my sides, man's hold seemingly hardens. Though my eyes remain clenched shut, a single rivulet still glides down my cheek and resent it for doing so. I despise the vulnerability, the meekness of self in this moment.

"Forgive me, Tallulah. I'm truly so sorry," I hear him say, I feel as his face finds rest by the hollow of my neck.
"You...you hurt me, Noe," I let the fragility ooze in my tone as I still myself in his touch.
My arms do not levitate to hold him, though. They remain immobile, unmoving by my left and right side as man's hold grows a tad bit firm.
"I'm sorry, Tallulah. I...got scared," softly, his voice vibrates in the crook of my neck.

He draws away from my neck and faces upon me. His gaze is now tender, soothing. I hate that it is, hate that I cannot hate him though he hurt me. His hold remains upon my skin, upon my waist, but I do not move to touch him. Not yet, no.
"What made you scared?" I query lowly.
He drags in one lengthy breath, exhales slowly.

"When I killed that woman, a lot memories surfaced. A lot of deaths. And those deaths scarred me. I thought to myself, if all those who I have loved died and left me, then you...you..." man chokes a little on his words, clears his throat in readiness for speech, "I had a very ugly thought in that moment. What if you too left me. So I thought, perhaps it would be best that I distance myself from you before it happened. Save myself the agony of losing another person again. I don't know if that makes sense. It still doesn't excuse my hurting you, Tallulah, and I'm so sorry that I did."