Cigarettes

3/15

"what are we doing tonight?" Niall says to me as we sit on Phoenix's front porch.

"I don't know man, I think I'm just gonna chill tonight." I say running my fingers through my hair.

"just chill? it's Saturday. quit being a pussy." Niall snatches my phone from me, as I was consumed in it.

Mary Mary Mary

that's all I could think about. I was worried, images of that creep taking advantage of her flickered in the back of my mind causing my jaw to clench.

"Phoenix is having another get together tonight, Mary's going so don't worry about her." Niall says tossing my phone to me before walking into the flat.

as he does so Mary and Phoenix pull up to Mary's driveway and get out carrying about 6 shopping bags each.

before making it up her porch stairs she spots me and blows me a kiss sending chills down my spine.

she made me feel indescribable. you know the feeling you get as your foot reaches for a stair that's not there? it was that feeling constantly, every time she looked at me, talked to me, or even crossed my mind.

but I didn't love her, I couldn't love her. besides this isn't what people describe as love, that feeling I got. it's more of a lust, and I wasn't going to mistake it for something so major.

but the way she tucked her hair behind her ear when she's annoyed, and the way her nose crinkles up when she laughs, or the way she chewed on her lip when she was nervous made me feel warm inside, and I did not want that feeling to fade away.
__________________________

the party had begun and waves of people flooded Phoenix's flat, be cell Phoenix and mary.
"where could they be?" I say to myself.

as I finish my sentence Phoenix and mary make their way into Phoenix's living room, mary carrying the bottle, Phoenix carrying the spliffs.

"way to make an entrance." I say sipping my drink acting like I wasn't worried sick about her.

"I had to look good right?" she says doing a 360 degree turn.

and god damn she did. I eyed her up from her stilettos to the invisible straps from her dress, and all I could think of was how and when I was going to take it all off.