Nameless // h.s. au

Chapter Twenty Four

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Chapter Twenty Four

*Hunter*

Cancer.

I remember when I was around ten I watched that movie... you know the one with the sisters. I don't really remember much of it because I only watched it once but I remember being completely wasted off the subject of death and dying and cancer.

I remember sitting on our couch, the same one I accidently spilled my juice on when I was six and then was never able to eat or drink anything on it. I was sitting there just staring at the blank screen of the television and picturing the look on that dead girls face with her shaved head and that sad music. I was a mix of disturbed and entranced by the idea of death.

My mother was the one who snapped me out of it saying it was a waste of my time to just sit there staring at a blank screen when it was just a movie and if I wanted to know death I just had to look outside. Seems harsh right? But then it wasn't, neither was the no eating on the couch rule. It was just mom. She always wanted things a certain way and that was alright because she was my mom and she sang me "You are my sunshine" every night so of course it was okay. Right?

*

"Hunter get your feet off the couch. Mark will be here any minute." She's pacing again, biting those god awful acrylic nails and looking around the room as if someone is hiding in the corner waiting to embarrass her.

"Yep." I huff quietly as I slide my sock clad feet off the couch and onto the carpet.

When the door-bell finally rings I swear it's like a gun has been fired and the race has begun. I'm almost amused at the look on her face, she's almost like a nervous teenager. She reminds me of Alexis, sort of, the first time she went out with Myles. Christ, she was so nervous her hands were shaking and her eyes were wide but her lips had the biggest smile. Alexis is so pretty. Why can't I be pretty like Alexis?

"Hello darling." His hair is slicked back. He looks younger than mom but his hair is still peppered in grey. Thin lips kiss her cheek as she blushes. Why can't I be happy like her?

"Mark this is my daughter Hunter." His dark brown eyes flick to me, almost as if he's the judge and I'm in trial, "Hunter. Say hello." Her voice comes out as a hiss through her teeth.

"Hi." I cough awkwardly and stare at the ground.

"Lovely to meet you Hunter." He smiles a crooked smile and walks closer. He smells of heavy cologne as he wraps his arms around my shoulders. I can feel his breath against my ear and my body slowly becoming smaller in the prolonged hug, "Lovely."

Lovely. Lovely. Lovely.

Pretty. Happy. Lovely.

Gone. Gone. Gone.

*

Death is an odd beast. It's not only the moment where someone's skin goes cold and their heart stops beating. Death is the ending of something.

The day that Mark Hollis walked into my life was the day something in me died, not to sound too cliché but in my thirteenth year in life I didn't expect the epitome of everything wrong in the world to walk through my front door with my mother on his hip.

I didn't expect my relationship with my mother to die either but my fate was sealed with one word...lovely. Lovely Hunter as he used to call me. When I was sick and my mother was working... Lovely Hunter. When I was heartbroken over meaningless crushes... Lovely Hunter. When mom was away on business... Lovely Hunter.