Young Sirius Black

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The party was still in full swing by midnight, showing no signs of stopping before dawn. Y/N was in her favourite party outfit, trying to be happy whilst dancing with her friends. The Gryffindor back to school parties were legendary, with the best drinks, smuggled from Madame Rosmerta's stores. Of course, nobody knew where the drinks came from, they were always just there, an endless supply for the night.

News had spread quickly of Sirius Blacks' and Y/N Y/L/Ns' break up, rumors and snide comments still being passed around after a year or so. Several girls were still gloating over her loss of 'the hottest boy in school'.

The few good people who knew Sirius truly loved Y/N, a.k.a, the Marauders, knew the real reason for him breaking up with her, and that it was killing him.

Before they got to together, the marauders had to put up with Sirius fan-girling every day. Despite thinking it couldn't get any worse, it did when she finally said yes to him. She occupied his every thought, and he genuinely cared about her.
He still does.

The pair started dating near the beginning of fifth year, seemingly going strong until sixth year, when he mysteriously broke up with her on the Hogwarts express with no reason.

Nobody except the Marauders knew Sirius ran away from home, so nobody knew the real reason they broke up. It was left to speculation. And the rumors were killing both of them. Sirius endured hours of listening to people sneering that Y/N wasn't worth it and it was no mystery he broke up with her- according to everyone he was pity dating her. It was far from that though, not that Sirius could do anything about it. He couldn't shout out that you were worth it, you were worth everything, you deserved the world. He couldn't scream that he wasn't pity dating you, he truly admired everything about you. He had given up the right to defending you when he called it quits, and he really wanted that right back.

He really wanted you back.

Even though he couldn't outright ask you how you were and comfort you, he still checked up from afar. He made sure you were eating, you were happy and looking after yourself. When people showed interest, he still got jealous, but saw where the attraction came from; you were perfect.

It was still hard though, knowing you'd eventually move on and get all the things you deserved. Even harder knowing he wouldn't be the one to give them to you.

Back to the party.

It was agony for Sirius, having to watch you being gorgeous whilst dancing, not being able to grab you and join in, no matter how desperately he wanted to. You looked like you were having fun, but he knew better, he knew looks could be deceiving, and the little hints here and there displayed you were not enjoying this party.

Walking over, he tapped you on the shoulder, and when you turned around, your face lit up. Until it fell again when you remembered everything that had happened. "What do you want, Sirius?"
"You wanna get out of here, I know how much you don't like parties."
You contemplated, it was true, parties weren't exactly your scene, but going with your ex that you still love? Risky. "Okay."
"Okay?"
"Okay, let's get out of here." His face lit up as he grabbed your hand, steering you towards the portrait, leading you into a slightly chillier corridor. "Where do you want to go?"
You thought for a moment, before deciding the room of requirement would be the best option. "Room of Requirement, I need to sit down."
And off you went.

Reaching the seventh floor corridor, Sirius walked three times past the wall, a door materialising on the third pass. Opening it, you saw two comfy chairs, overlooking a roaring fire, and blankets on said chairs. Two butterbeers were sitting on the coffee table, waiting to be drunk. Sirius sat down first, grabbing a butterbeer whilst you wrapped yourself in the blanket before grabbing yours. "So, how've you been?"
"Please don't, Siri, I can't engage in small talk with you." You responded, staring into the fire. His heart leapt at the sound of your old nickname for him, bringing back memories from the year before.

Sitting on a blanket with Sirius, with food laid out in front of you, you watched the scene in front of you. James was once again trying to get Lily Evans to date him, failing miserably. Lily had become closer to the marauders after the incident in fifth year with Snivellous, though, and you believed her to be warming up to James. Slowly, but it was happening. You were watching the hilarious banter between the two, whilst Sirius was watching you. The way your hair blew in the breeze, the way your eyes lit up when you laughed and the sound you produced was like music to his ears. He wasn't ashamed of staring, he did it a lot, always finding himself mesmerized by you.

In fact, he was staring right now. Your face was softened by the firelight, it left a lush amber glow on your skin and your eyes reflected the flames. Feeling his eyes on you, you slowly turned your head to meet his gaze, blushing under the intensity of it. "I'm sorry." He said, sincerely.
"Excuse me?"
"I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"Letting you go." Was his quiet reply. You felt for the boy in front of you. You had discovered a bit about his home life, him opening up to you on countless occasions. You stayed with him on sleepless nights, when he had horrific nightmares about his family, and you felt for him. He was only 17, but was already so broken, heart aching for the sad picture in front of you, you stood up and walked towards him, stopping in front of his chair. Sirius looked up, meeting your eyes with his glassy grey ones. He softly pulled you into his lap, craving your hugs he had missed so dearly this past year. You softly put your arms around his neck, whilst he quietly sobbed into your shoulder.
"I didn't want to do it, they-they made me."
"Didn't want to do what, Sirius?"
"Let you go." Silence. " I ran away, you know, couldn't take it anymore, the horrible shouting, the curses being used against me." Again, silence. "The last straw was when, when..."
"When what?" You whispered softly.
" When they threatened you and your family." You pulled back to look at him, tears flowing down his cheeks silently. "Mother said you weren't worth it, said I would regret tying myself to you, that I had to break up with you or else." He pulled you closer once again. "The only thing I regret is leaving you. I hated the way they spoke about you, it was what spurred me on to leave. And I did, told them I'd be going now and packed my bags. Hurt like a bitch when no-one stopped me." He chuckled weakly. " Got the knight bus to James's, been living there ever since. I was still scared for you, father is very influential, so I did it to keep you safe. Please forgive me, I don't know what I'd do if you didn't forgive me."
You were horrified, saddened by the fact he gave everything up to keep you safe, but you had never felt more gratitude for the person in front of you. " Of course I forgive you, Siri, why wouldn't I?"
" Because I hurt you."
"Okay, you did, but it hurts me even more to see you like this! Don't listen to that old hag! You don't need her, you have James, Remus, Lily, Peter. You have me."
He looked at you again. "I do?"
"Always have, always will."
"I love you."
You smiled to yourself, "I love you too." He kissed you, passionately, trying to make up for the last year, and how horrible it was not to have you there with him.

The door to the room opened, James and Lily walking in, giggling. They stopped short at seeing you, Lily smirking whilst James blushed. " Urm, h-hey, what are you two doing here?"
"I guess I could ask you the same thing, Prongs."
" We were just..."
"Leaving." Lily finished, walking back out, dragging James behind her like a lost puppy. You looked back at Sirius, "what was that?"
" I honestly don't know, and I don't want to. Now, where were we?"

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