Her Blade

HB 15

 I tried laughing at his jokes, but he never did laugh with me. He just sat here beside me looking serious while his finger was still caressing my hand. Natigilan naman ako sa pagtawa na ikinangiti niya.

Was he for real?

"Yes, I'm serious about you."

My mouth gaped open as he clarified what he said a while ago. "You must be really kidding with me, Dion. It's impossible for you to be with me. Hindi ako taga-rito at alam mo kung anong mga p'wedeng mangyari!" sigaw ko rito at binawi ang aking kamay mula sa kanya.

Maaaring nalito lamang siya sa relasyon namin bilang magkaibigan at sa tingin niya ay ibang klaseng pagmamahal ang kanyang nararamdaman sa 'kin. Siguro rin ay hindi niya masyadong naisip ang mga bagay gaya ng aking nabanggit, kaya nagpadalos-dalos ito sa kanyang nararamdaman. Kung ano man, paniguradong hindi maganda ang kalalabasan ng lahat. 

But instead of being fazed, he just smiled as he shook his head lightly. He even caressed my head, even though my facial expression doesn't match well with his confession. I am aware that my forehead is creased, my eyes are confused, but he's just here... smiling.

"I am well-aware, Syra. The imperial family is also aware of my situation, but did you know what they told me? They said that I know what I'm doing and they would be on stand-by in case anything happens—" He held my hand once again and kissed the back of my palm, "—I know that you'll react exactly like this, but I'm willing to wait and gamble everything I have just to have you."

Surreal.

It feels exactly like that as he told me those words with pure honesty and sincerity evident in his amber eyes. I don't know what to say or act at the moment, my mind's clouded and I can't think straight to this point. Do I have to answer right away?

Hindi na rin pala nakakapagtaka kung bakit parang ang daming alam ni Nyx tungkol kay Dion lately. She knows. The imperial family knows about this.

"What's going on inside your head? You don't have to do anything, Syra. Don't feel pressured. For now, let's get you inside. It's getting cold." He stood up and dusted off his pants before he helped me stand up, still holding my hand.

After we had that conversation, Dion acted normally on the following days. Sabay pa rin kaming kumakain during breakfast, lunch, and dinner. He still asks the usual questions, but here I am, acting strange around him. Unlike today and yesterday, parang hindi ko yata siya nakita sa duchy at hindi na rin ito sumasabay sa 'king kumain.

I wonder what happened. Did his senses finally come back?

"Reina, did you see the duke around the duchy?" tanong ko sa kanya habang abala ito sa pagsusuklay ng aking buhok. "Sa wakas, nagtanong ka na rin. Halos lumibot 'yung mga mata mo lagi tuwing naglalakad tayo sa mga pasilyo, e." Tinignan ko ito mula sa salamin at nginitian lamang ako nito. "Hindi ko rin nakikita ang duke. Baka nagkulong na naman 'yon sa study room niya, madalas niya kasing ginagawa 'yon noon," sagot naman nito.

"Nagkukulong? Bakit?"

"Sa pagkakaalam ko, ginagawa niya 'yon sa tuwing may problema siya o may mali siyang naging desisyon para agad niyang masolusyunan. Madalas lalabas siya matapos ang isang linggo kaya dinadalhan na lang siya ng pagkain doon."